In Love With Darkness, Loyal To Light
by BluestarsFiire
Summary: Many say it is wise to follow one's heart; but what does one do when their heart in torn between two different places? Jazzy Blue Star, a 7th year Slytherin at Hogwarts struggles to choose loyalty between Voldemort and Dumbledore as she finds herself in love with an unpredictable, dangerous Death Eater, Barty Crouch Jr. OC/Barty Crouch Jr.
1. A Madman's Rose

Chapter 1

The Madman's Rose

The house was a good atmosphere for a Death Eater reunion, with its dim lighting, grimly poignant undertone and suggestions of additional decoration that looked more than a little malevolent. It was just my luck that the Dark Lord himself had chosen here, of all places, to withhold a meeting with the most wanted people in the entire wizarding world.

But hey, who was I to argue; a young daughter of a Death Eater whom could only sit and chew crossly on a bit of toast while the rest discussed sneaky malicious little secrets as if I weren't present; in _my_ chairs, at _my_ dining table, in _my_ kitchen- I might add.

Unfortunately, the said house as you might have guessed _was my house._ I didn't mind the dark, in fact; I rather liked it- as being in light areas made me feel vulnerable and open while dwelling in darkness had a bit of a comforting sense to it. But the presence of an entire cult of Death Eaters? That was never pleasant.

I might've been a Slytherin, but I was no Death Eater nor slave of the Dark Lord's. I was to simply be silent and polite to our "guests" as instructed by my father. I really didn't have much of a choice…

What annoyed me the most was the way these people treated me, and it seemed slightly out of character honestly. My father was popular amongst the others, believe it or not; and they all had good cause to treat me just as well (luckily). Heck, it was nice not having the alternative of being hated by such dangerous people, however being sapped over wasn't necessarily fantastic either.

The Death Eaters often swarmed me with their pathetic pet names; things such as "Malady, My dearest, sweetheart, mistress, and so on, so forth… Especially that chump, Peter Pettiwhatever (I usually just referred to him as Wormtail, quite a suitable name really) who practically smothered me with his seething "politeness." I could sense he really only did it out of fear towards my father- probably thinking he was expected to do it or else he'd get in trouble from the rest. The coward usually cast hopeful glances up at my dad after saying such things. What he didn't know was that I didn't want to hear him talk at all; and I really, really did not want to be here.

Of course, Wormtail was here already- along with Bellatrix and Fenrir Greyback. As I already stated, I didn't like Wormtail. Neither did I like Fenrir- who reminded me of some kind of feral beast on a bloodthirsty rampage. Which, he was- being a crazed werewolf and all. Bellatrix; well, she could only be described as literally bat-shit crazy. There was a certain charm about her though when she was amongst allies; and quite surprisingly I didn't mind her as much as the others. As long as she wasn't in one of those nutty crazy psychotic phases again where almost everything in sight seemingly ended up demolished.

There was only one person who I actually liked; my best friend. Draco Malfoy- a fellow Slytherin pal of mine who would be arriving soon along with his parents Mr. Lucius and Mrs. Narcissa. I was aware of Draco's tendency of cruelty- however we somehow bonded over the prospect of being the two youngest people in the room with a bunch of convicted killers- and at Hogwarts we'd found one another as friends through sheer fate. We were kinda both in the same situation of pressure under our parent's expectations of becoming a dark wizard. However, even when those matters where irrelevant, there was a certain chemistry between us.

I was delighted when the Malfoy's arrived (thought I didn't show it, staying quiet as instructed) as Draco himself pulled up a chair next to me and studied me for a moment, platinum blonde bangs slightly winded after what I assumed was a broom flight to the meeting place.

"Well, you sure look saltier than usual."

"_Do I?" _

There it was; our normal dry sarcastic start of conversation. That seemed to comfort me a bit, having something predictable and normal to rely on. He smirked, a teasing gleam in his eye as he looked me over again.

"You're not usually this sour." I gave him a half-hearted glare and sighed grumpily, rolling my eyes.

"_Hmm, I wonder why?!" _

Any outsider wouldn't guess we were friends. We had a strange way of expressing it. We shared a trait of dry sarcastic humor and usually poked fun at one another trying to get an upper hand. It was a constant competition; but I liked it. I needed something like Draco to stimulate my brain and give me someone to humor with.

Besides, even if we took shots at one another regularly, we both thought it was funny.

"Hey- look at that, Wormtail's already giving you the lust eyes again."

My face contorted into disgust at that. It was no secret Wormtail, as old as he was, had some kind of pervy thing going on for me. It brought bile to my throat. A threw a death-look over at Wormtail who quickly averted his gaze with a rat-like twitch of his head; his pathetic frame shaking instantaneously with fright.

Draco simply snorted, quite amused at the display.

I decided to stay quiet, as I was currently so disturbed, so pissed, and so outrageously pushed to my limits; I feared if I opened my mouth something would slip out that would cost me allot. Probably even my life, if the Dark Lord was here. I knew I had a tendency to do that anyway. So, I settled for shooting Draco a look that read _"I swear to god, I will get you back for this later…"_

And I turned my head once more to watch as the last of the Death Eaters filed in, sat down, and officially began the meeting. There were many of them I didn't know, to my surprise. People I hadn't seen before. Probably because the Dark Lord had pretty much just returned after years of silence and absence. Those who were on "hiatus" during this time period had apparently returned.

They all caught on to that traditional greeting of the young lady (me) I suppose as they entered, taking example of everyone else who was calling me by my pet names and approaching graciously before bowing, kissing my hand (oh god, ew..) and greeting me with a "What a pleasure to meet you, Malady.." or, "Please, I thank you for your presence Mistress.."

I never really understood this procedure, as it had always kinda been that way. It had started when I was small- and I hadn't been smart enough then to realize what was going on, so now in my older days I had learned not to question it. All I knew was that I was expected to smile real wide and nod politely while responding with something equally as pleasant.

But still, all these ludicrous nicknames. I was no better than that ridiculous snake of the Dark Lord's.

Though, there was one man who caught my attention as he stepped into my household. The room got instantaneously silent, and the man cast wild eyes around the table as if daring someone to speak. There was an aura about him; some kind of cloud of insanity that followed his gaze that wasn't… _Normal._ Even for a Death Eater.

His face was frail and bony- as if he were almost starved; straw blonde hair with tints of caramel honey in its color wildly strewn about in an unkempt mess about his head. Still, he couldn't be more than a few years older than me. He was practically my age. His eyes withheld a madness- a fury, and an ambition in their deep chocolate brown depths. His pointed face was dirty- along with his dark shirt and leather trench coat that was a little oversized for his thin, slender frame. He was covered in white… powder? I didn't know what it was.

He made me tense- and I straightened up immediately at his presence. He found the closest chair available next to the spot we all knew that the Dark Lord would be sitting, and I- being purposefully as far away as possible from that specific spot- could only really get a small glimpse at him every now and then.

But even so, I was drawn to him- and my eyes kept lingering over to that spot where I knew he was sitting.

"_Who… Is he?"_ I asked in a whisper, nudging Draco and nodding in the direction of the strange man who had just entered.

In a hushed voice, Draco answered me in an undertone that was barely audible- even as I was next to him.

"Barty Crouch Jr." He said, a tint of disbelief in his voice as he spoke the name.

"_Barty Crouch… Junior."_ I muttered, testing the name on my own lips.

"Just got back from Azkaban I expect. Sure looks like hell, doesn't he? Makes you wonder what happens in those prison cells..."

I nodded grimly, just as I finally managed to get a good look at him. Right as I had begun to observe properly, his own eyes swerved about and rested directly on me.

It was almost as if my lungs had been seized of all the oxygen I had- and I found myself both transfixed and terrified at the same time. He stared relentlessly into my eyes; before a playful smirk crossed his lips. And… His tongue had flicked out of his mouth and grazed the top of his lip as he continued staring.

I felt myself shiver- but I held my composure and stared right back boldly at him. I wasn't going to show I was intimidated by some freak in front of such a judgmental audience.

Once more, his tongue flicked out- faster this time, and he cocked an eyebrow at me before slowly turning away, a hint of amusement on his wild face.

Once his eyes had left me I let down my composure and let out a ghastly shiver, letting the expression of terror cross my face finally.

"_What a dreadful creature…"_ I muttered to Draco, who of course found such unfortunate events on my part hilarious. He was chuckling and nudging me teasingly.

He was trying to make fun of me meanwhile trying to avoid the attention of his father; knowing his shenanigans would get him into trouble.

"_Seriously!"_ I said, trying to convey to him that I found this very severe. _"Did you see his tongue?! What the bloody hell was that about?"_

Draco finally quit his bickering with me and shook his head, laughing still like I was a fool.

"Oh, he always does that. But I'll mind you; he definitely only does it when he gets excited. By the looks of it you've got him a little more than just _that."_

"Ohhhh, nooo, grosss Draco! No, that's disgusting…" I groaned, bringing the palm of my hand to my face in aggravation. I couldn't really tell if he meant excited in a happy-stabby evil criminal plotful way, or… Yea… _That way._

"I'm just kidding…!" He said, frowning as his father caught his eye.

And, as expected-

"**Draco, silence."**

We both silenced.

Soon enough, we learned why- and that presence that always alerted everyone in the room immediately swept over the household like a blanket- but a quilt made of ice, not warmth. Wormtail began cringing and whimpering, until there he was- right in front of us.

The Dark Lord…

I hated that feeling you got before he showed up. When you felt that specific sensation you always knew he was coming.

Striding around the room in his dangerous poise, he took his seat like the king he knew he was- and took in the sight of us all with his _snake_ eyes; sniffing the air with his _snake_ nose- and forming words with his _snake_ mouth.

I turned to look at Barty- to see his eyes wider than they had been when he'd first joined us, and it was obvious that he was clinging on to every last word the Dark Lord spoke. I looked away, and listened obediently.

Well, not really- I _appeared_ to be listening obediently, but usually these things took about an hour or so, and I often took to drifting off into my own thoughts.

It took about thirty minutes of plotting between the Death Eaters before I figured everyone was distracted enough that I could talk to Draco again.

"Draco, where is Snape?"

"School is starting soon, so probably at Hogwarts." He said, grimacing at the idea of school. I knew he didn't like Hogwarts. However I thought differently so I simply ignored the prospect and nodded.

Soon enough, to my relief- we were dismissed. And, to my further relief; the Dark Lord had left. However, things had taken a turn for the worst as I realized that the Death Eaters where to be staying at my house until further notice from the Master. My heart sank at this. I didn't want nasty ratty Wormtail, feral Fenrir, and crazy Bella staying in my house. Sure, Draco was fine, but everyone else…. Ugh.

I kept up my act of politeness however until I stumbled outside and blindly thrashed about in the yard with fury- Draco following behind. Apparently, even in my display of rage he didn't understand that now was not the time to make jokes.

He opened his mouth to speak- and he started, but I was finished. Angrily I turned tail on him and hissed at him to leave me alone and go back upstairs. I knew he could take it, he had thick skin. Shrugging, he gave me a look of exasperation and dramatically made his way back inside.

I gave an angry sigh- and made my way over to the pond that lay directly north of our backyard. I liked the pond, as it was always kind of dark with trees shading its tranquil presence- making me feel covered and safe in shadows. Nobody could see me, so I was hereby secure. However the occasional bits of light filtered through the trees leaves and created speckles of stardust along the water's surface; where I then peered into it curiously as I always did.

I could always unwind here, and as the lake focused on my reflection slowly I found my own face staring back up at me.

There was my hair that stretched all the way down to my mid back; the top of my head being my natural raven black color while the majority of the rest of my curls where dyed an intensely vibrant electric blue that faded in an ombre pattern to light baby blue. I took great pride in my hair, and after dying it I'd always felt it was my best feature. It made me look exotic and noticeable. I admired it for a while, trailing my fingers down the soft curled spirals that faded from black, to electric blue, to baby blue.

Then, my gaze shifted to my face. I had a decently pretty face, though I felt like I could never really decide how I felt about my physical image. I had my usual skillfully applied makeup on, the black winged eyeliner being my trademark addition. Yes, there were my nice cheekbones and expressive dark chocolate brown eyes. I had once thought I was the ugliest child ever, and I had also once thought I looked like a princess. Those where different times, though. Now, I wasn't sure what I was.

The most noticeable thing about me however was probably my social markers, or my clothes so to speak. I was your classic punk gothic metal head. Though, not as intense as allot of those types. I had on some cuffs with chains and crosses on them that decorated my wrists over my long-sleeved shirt with a well-known metal band on it; the scary design frozen in place on the fabric. There was also my studded belt, my chain, my jeans, and leather combat boots. Yes, I was slightly intimidating, and many tended to prejudge me based on my harsh outer appearance at first. But truly I was normally quite friendly. Not today though, having Death Eaters in my house. That was understandable.

I broke out of my trance and once again found myself contemplating on how I could solve this visitor problem.

"Damn Death Eaters…" I growled to myself, shaking my head and watching as my reflection copied my actions.

"_Am I really all that bad, dear? Surely you could use some company in your distress…"_

In that instant I could've sworn I jumped so high I'd have reached space; but no, the voice that had elicited from somewhere behind me. I inhaled sharply, and turned to see who this intruder was. He had spoken almost teasingly, playfully… _Mischievously._

There he was, staring back at me with that same arousing intensity.

_Barty Crouch Jr…_

I was appalled, and shocked beyond belief. My brain couldn't decide whether to be furious, scared, or surprised. So, I just sat there and gazed at him like a fool.

_How on earth had he found me here?! And furthermore, why on earth WAS he here?!_

My mind took a moment to process his voice. It was tainted with an accent, Scottish maybe? The way he used it was like silk, soft- but of course dangerous nonetheless. I realized then that I was probably in mortal danger, sitting here alone and vulnerable with a Death Eater who had just escaped Azkaban (and was still more than likely at the start of recovering mentally from the feat..)

He seemed to be very much enjoying my reaction, and a crooked smirk crossed his lips as he watched me with burning passionate amusement.

But I took a moment instead to process his words. Easily, I maintained my dignity like I always did, straightened up as I had before- and lifted my head pridefully and met his crazed eyes with as much indifference on my face as I could manage.

"What do you want." I said coldly, in statement rather than a question.

"_Forgive me,"_ He drawled, nearing me slowly like an advancing predator. Every muscle- every bone in my body screamed _**"danger"**_

But I was frozen, and I watched him approach.

"_Where are my manors?" _

"I don't know, why don't you go run off and find them before talking to _me._" I replied hotly, my courage building up as a result of my returning anger towards the Death Eater.

He tilted his head and his manic grin grew in size, as my reply seemingly had the opposite effect as I intended. It had… _excited him?_

Yes, it had- there was that tongue flicker thing he did.

Finally, he took that moment to take one last step so that he was now entirely in front of me. I stood, and looked up at him expectantly.

His eyes lowered for a moment, and he bowed his head slightly.

_God, what. Did. He. WANT?_

"_I apologize for not introducing myself properly sweetheart, I'm afraid the situation at hand prevented me from interaction with you."_

_Did he really come all the way out here to "introduce himself?"_

I hadn't noticed before, but he had one hand hidden behind his back; and in that instant he removed it from secrecy and presented me with a brilliant white rose. I was momentarily shocked once more… Though after a few more seconds of recovery from this strange gift I acknowledged it as nothing more than some sort of spiteful trickery. He took hold of my hand and kissed It as if he where some kind of gentlemen (which was completely ironic in his current state; as he was still dirty and physically reduced to a mental savage)

His lips where moist, probably from the licking- and as he pulled away from my hand he licked his lips once; twice more in his strange rapid little way.

I stared down at him coldly, letting him know that I was not that easily fooled. He grinned cockily back up at me. I was briefly reminded of the look the Big Bad Wolf gave Little Red Riding hood in the fairy tales as he stalked her.

"_Tell me, what are you doing out here all by yourself? Where's your little snake friend, hmm?"_

"I…" I stuttered, then cursed under my breath before realizing my mistake.

Barty was quite pleased at this.

"That's none of your business. I came out here to be alone, and that condition does not exclude you." I said finally; feeling proud of my recovery.

He chuckled, a surprisingly gentle velvety sound that made me feel a little dizzy.

"_Goodness, are you feisty. I suppose I'll see you at dinner then, dear."_

And then, he began to simply walk away as if our so called "conversation" had never occurred. For some reason, this made something stir inside of me. Who did he think we was, coming and leaving as he chose? Messing with me, getting inside my head with his stupid little grin? And then he figured he could just _leave?_

"Wait! Stop!" I called after him.

He paused, then turned around with that bloody arrogant snicker on his face.

"W-Whats your name?" I asked.

_**What? Why in God's name would I ask that?! I already knew the question to that answer, so why on earth-?!**_

"Barty." He said, and for the first time since I'd met him that smirk turned into something that looked almost like a genuine smile. A real one.

"_Barty Crouch Jr."_ He finished, a hint of distaste in his tone as he said it.

"Barty…" I said. That made him happy again at least, I thought; and he gave one last brief lick of his lips.

"_And your name, dear?"_

"Jazlynn."

And just as I'd said his name, he tested out mine as well.

"_Well, as I said before. Pleasure to meet you, Jazlynn." _A shiver ran down my spine, and I managed a curt nod. Something about him having the power of knowing my name was strange.

"_See you at dinner."_

Another lick.

And with that he finally departed from my presence. In my hand, I still held that same rose. For a moment I contemplated on what I should do with it. It was very easily potentially dangerous- and I had not yet uncovered Barty's motives for what he had done. But, I knew they were probably malevolent.

Still, a part of me wanted to keep it. I wasn't sure why; though maybe it was because it was the nicest gesture any Death Eater had ever made towards me.

Still, that could be for deceitful reasons… My logic told me.

And so finally, I made my decision and left the rose there on the boulder that sat soundly directly under my trees, a few inches away from the edge of the pond where I often sat and pondered. I would be sure to come back and investigate it more. Hopefully, if I found it was harmless, I would keep it.

"_Barty Crouch Jr."_ I muttered. _"What a madman."_


	2. The Suspicious Three

Chapter 2

The Suspicious Three

I took my time in getting home, feeling slightly unwilling to go back into the house where I knew Barty, Bellatrix, Fenrir, and Wormtail were. Oh yea, and great; now I had to eat dinner with them and pretend like we were all civilized, polite people; which they most obviously weren't.

I made my way to the back door finally and hesitantly raised a hand to grip the handle, turning it slightly and moving as slow as I could as to prevent any noise. I didn't want to draw attention to myself, or be detected. However this was entirely in vain, as it seemed that most of my house's inhabitants where all crowded around the kitchen where I was entering from. I soon realized why, as I inhaled the scent of freshly baked bread, juicy steak, and many more delicacies. My mother had taken to prepping this particular meal rather than having the house elves cook- probably wanting to impress her guests. This was a clear sign that dinner was almost ready.

I stopped as my advancement towards the stairs was interrupted by an unwanted intruder.

Annoyed at first, I stopped and lifted my head with a defiant expression to meet the eyes of Draco Malfoy. My face softened as I realized it was him, and he was wearing a very secretive appearance. He drew a rapid finger to his lips in a "hush" gesture then beckoned me up the stairs- where he shoved me into a closet, closed the door behind us, and locked it. I rolled my eyes; then remembered in the darkness he couldn't see it- so instead I gave a loud, dramatic sigh.

"Oh, hush up will you…" He said, referring to my display of annoyance.

"_What._ What is it?" I replied, ignoring his scolding and instead gazing around the tight space shiftily.

The room was dark, of course- being a closet, but the area was a constricted squeeze with two people jammed inside. Many coats and other fine pieces of clothing where lavished about in an orderly fashion about the hangers and drawers, to the point where it looked like some sort of showy mall display. I was leaning up against the wall facing away from Draco- trying to provide myself with as much room as possible. Honestly, this was ridiculous; and it dawned on me pretty quickly how stupid this was. Whether it be some sort of plan or secret Draco was planning to tell me; did we_ really_ need to cower inside a _freakin closet?_

"_Listen,"_ He said quickly, and there was obvious anxiety in his voice as he spoke to me.

"_I think Fenrir might have something either for you, or against you..."_ He said.

"What? _Fenrir Greyback?!_" What was he saying?

_Fenrir had never in my life taken any sort of interest in me, so why all the sudden was Draco saying this? Where had this unexpected rumor come from? I had no reason to believe this of course, knowing that I had not once seen the man observing me or anything like that at all. He hadn't even really said a word to me other than the expected normal greeting upon joining the previous meeting. I was an observant person, and if I hadn't noticed anything on Fenrir's part; then this must be something of Draco's deception._

"Yea," He said. "Look; when you when outside a few hours ago and you forced me back inside-"

"-Oh, um; sorry about that by the way…"

"-Yea whatever, but anyways I came inside and Fenrir was… _Stalking you. Like, watching you as you went out the door through the window and literally growling like he was in his werewolf state."_

"_What?! W-Why?" _I asked, eyes widening in terror at the idea of such a thing. Fenrir was far more than just "intimidating." He was terrifying, in both appearance and character. He was gigantic, hairy, and menacing. He was quite obviously a werewolf, even in his human form; but the darkest thing about him was his known bloodthirsty drive to bite children… and turn them into monsters like himself.

"Are you sure it wasn't Wormtail..?" I thought, "Or, or Barty?"

_"What?_ No! Wait, _Barty Crouch Jr?_ Why would you bring him up, he hasn't done anything to you, has he?" Even in the dark, I could see Draco's eyes widen at that; knowing how dangerous that was.

"He came and talked to me outside. Didn't you see him leave the house? It was creepy, the way he just slithered over and started sneering at me."

"No, in fact. I didn't. I didn't see a thing… Anyways the fact remains that Fenrir has obvious plans."

_I shook my head, clearing it of Draco's insane theories. This couldn't be true, he was just making something up. Right? Maybe he was just trying to get me all scared so that he could make fun of me for it later. Yea, that sounded like something Draco would do. It made sense as well, maybe this was his sick idea of revenge after I snapped at him earlier._

Still, caution was never a bad idea. "Alright. I will keep an eye out." I said, brows furrowing into a skeptical expression as Draco nodded, a bit relieved.

_Honestly, what was he on about?_

Apparently, I had two stalkers now. Wormtail and Fenrir.

Oh, yea; make that three, if I counted Barty.

Soon enough, after retiring to my room for an hour to comfortably unwind, the announcement that dinner was now ready rang through the house like an echo, and I was called forth from my dwelling to what I dreaded most. The idea of eating with nasty, sickening Death Eaters.

It seemed I was first at the table, followed by Fenrir- who sat quite purposefully far away from me with an expression of solemn boredom on his wolf-like face. I watched him intently for a few moments to see if I could confirm anything about what Draco said; only to see him do nothing but remain quiet. He didn't even look at me.

A bit of my worries where quelled at this, and I felt a little bit less jumpy where I was.

This changed in seconds of course, the moment another company entered the room. Slowly, cautiously; I shifted my gaze over to him.

Barty Crouch Jr. made way over to the dining table in his usual way; each step elegant and well executed. He spotted me, and his eyes widened ever so slightly before a short snicker graced his face and he approached.

I swallowed and immediately averted my gaze, trying to send him as many messages as I could through body language that I wanted him as far away from me as possible. I knew I couldn't just say so with Fenrir's presence, but to my relief Barty settled for sitting about two seats away from me. Still a little close, but not too bad.

However I didn't put forth the same effort in hiding relief as Draco finally came into sight along with his parents, before claiming his spot next to me expectantly.

I gave him a look that was intended to be a signal of my current situation with Barty, but he only returned it with a quizzical tilt of his head. I rolled my eyes, and sighed. …Stupid boy.

Soon enough everyone had joined, including my parents and every other Death Eater that had been at the meeting. Bellatrix Lestrange had claimed the only remaining seat next to me, and I felt slightly tense. Everyone knew Bella was a ticking time bomb that could suddenly explode and leave in her wrath a million destroyed pieces of what used to be her surroundings. I could only hope and pray that her docile behavior would last through the night.

But even so, Bellatrix was not the only thing making me anxious. The most worrisome part of the entire thing was Barty Crouch Jr, and his aggravating tenacious insistency on staring me down like prey. I ate my food politely, downing a bit of steak, some soup; and even a bit of soda while talking to Draco occasionally.

As normal as I looked on the outside, my insides where screaming- particularly at Barty.

_Stop. Staring. At. Me..! What in God's name could be sooo damn interesting about me that you have to stare and refuse to blink for an entire hour?!_

Each second was agonizingly slow, and each of those terrible moments where spent nonetheless being intruded by Barty Crouch's constant gaze. Still, I was a very observant girl- and I took note of everything he did.

The first thing I noticed about him at that time was the amount he was eating. He actually ate quite allot for a frail and bony fellow, but then I remembered that it was probably because of his lack of nutrients during time spent in Azkaban. He was trying to recover proper health.

He had easily eaten several pieces of garlic bread, two bowls of soup, and an entire steak. It was strange watching someone like him doing something as human as eating. It was such a normal thing for such a strange person to do.

At that moment my father straightened up and caught everyone's attention easily.

"Well, I believe it would be wise to sort out the sleeping situation, as all of you are staying no doubt by the Dark Lord's orders."

_At last, thank God-_ Barty's eyes had torn away from me to see what my father had to propose.

"Jaz?"

I lurched forward and almost choked on my piece of bread, then recovered as quickly as I could; replying with a straightforwardly well-mannered "Yes, father?" This was news; my father rarely addressed me in front of other Death Eaters.

"I know we have many guest rooms dear, but in this case it seems that even so you're going to have to make some room for a guest or two."

_WHAT?!_

My father read my expression easily and chuckled, shaking his head.

"Don't worry dear, I'm not going to pair you with anyone I know you're not comfortable with."

I scanned the row of Death Eaters before me, and highly doubted that statement.

"Draco, you're sleeping in her room if you don't mind."

He nodded curtly, and I felt a little bit of relief at that. Yea, he was a boy… Like, _ew_- but he was still my best friend; and furthermore _MUCH_ better than anyone else in the room.

"Alright." I replied.

"Barty?" My father addressed him next, and Barty raised an eyebrow at being addressed.

"You're directly right next to my daughter's room. The Dark Lord instructed I give you your own room for the sake of your recovery; which is going well I sincerely hope."

Barty nodded once; and I couldn't help but notice his gaze flicker once towards me while a wicked grin crossed his sharp features.

My father informed each person of their sleeping places, and I was pretty pissed off as I realized Barty was the only one with a room to himself.

Soon enough, the moment someone else had excused themselves first, I felt that I could now excuse myself as well and be free of this maniac. I left as politely as I could; washing off my plate, putting it in the dishwasher, and quickly going upstairs. I wanted to savor as much time as I could in my room before it was no longer private.

I didn't realize it at the time, but this was a terrible idea. Leaving first meant that anyone who excused themselves after me could come right upstairs and intrude while everyone else was distracted with dinner.

First, Draco had came in- peeking through my door and beginning a sentence. Before-

"Step aside,_ boy."_

It was my father, whom had firmly gripped Draco's arm as he entered my room- Draco yelping in surprise at the harsh physical treatment before he cast me a look of terror and scurried off.

"I must ask a favor of you. Barty has been feeling quite ill due to his recent escape from Azkaban and I think it would be kind of you to go help him unpack his things. I suggest you go now, as he is quite exhausted I would think."

And with that, he left.

…..

It took me a moment to process that, along with the burst of emotion that came with it.

_You're kidding… You must be joking… You can't be serious…._

"_That sly, tricky, good for nothing-!"_

I gave the side of my bed a half-hearted kick, knowing that I had no choice but to go face Barty once more. Even worse, I had to unpack his things like a little slave. He would surely enjoy that. Why couldn't the freakin house elf do it?

Either way, I knew I had no choice. My father's orders had always been nonnegotiable. And so, slowly- I made my way over to my own door and exited… Then, turned to my right to stare blankly at what I knew was Barty's room.

I inhaled, and exhaled… My breathing was rapid, and ghosted over with terror.

Finally, I stepped forward- reached out with a single fist…

_And knocked._


	3. The Dementor Cure

Chapter 3

The Dementor Cure

My heart skipped a beat as that familiar noise of thumping on wood elicited from Barty Crouch Jr.'s bedroom door. My frightened knocking only lasted a moment before there was an eerie silence that drifted through the air like a ghost. I waited, not daring to breathe as I listened intently, even going as far as to put my ear up to the wood in attempts to better hear what may or may not be going on inside.

I could swear that I heard… _whispering…_ of sorts. I strained to get a better grip on my hearing; trying to make out what I sensed.

"Um... P-Pardon, sir?" I asked hesitantly, my shaking hand slowly drifting over to the doorknob where I rested it there apprehensively. My eyes lowered and I watched my hand quiver there helplessly, and I felt like cursing at myself.

_Why does he have this effect on me? Why am I trembling?_

"_Nothing._ Come in." Came Barty's voice on the other side of the door, sounding a bit more curt than it usually did, with a hint of a growl in his tone.

_Oh, oh no… I couldn't do this… I had to open the door now and face him._

Even so, I did as I was told; and I slowly, hesitantly twisted the doorknob with little effort; uncomfortably shifting into sight so that I myself could observe his room.

The first thing I noticed was that it was hard to notice anything at all in the first place. The space was incredulously dark, which didn't surprise me; but it made things a little difficult to see. It took a few moments for my vision to adjust to the new lighting before I could truly intake my surroundings. I liked dark areas honestly, and I felt slightly less jumpy in the darkness as I slowly, steadily made my way into the room. It was quite simple, other than the familiar additions my mother had added to make the guest room more inviting. There was the wooden dresser, and next to it was what I could only assume was Barty's small trunk of valuables. There- in the corner, to my surprise; was a decently big black calico owl with amazing yellow eyes like pools of liquid gold. It watched me curiously as I continued my way through the room.

To my relief, nothing much had changed in here- and everything seemed to be in place.

_But- where was Barty?_

My mental question was answered as his voice elicited from my left side.

"Hello, dear."

His tone was dripping with sappy amusement, the mischief and dangerous delight in it making me want to turn and run. But instead, I forced myself to shift my position so that I was facing him. Still, my heart was pounding and adrenaline coursed through my veins.

I didn't understand why I felt this way. No other death eater, not even Fenrir; with his powerful muscled body and overpowering intimidation- nor Bellatrix and her unpredictable insanity, could even make me flinch with any hint of fear at all. They didn't scare me, they had no effect on me. So why did Barty, wild, crazed, and ill; terrify me to such a degree?

Perhaps it was that lingering sense of cunning he withheld. He might be mad, but when I was around him I could always feel a certain superior cleverness that emitted from everything he did. The way he spoke, the way he moved- it made me think of such words- Sly, clever, intelligent…

I was now gazing at him with surprising calmness, and I respectfully dipped my head in greeting towards him despite the frisky wicked flavor in his previous statement.

I noticed he looked even worse than he had before dinner, which I hadn't thought possible- but his wild honey brown hair was in great disarray, and his starved appearance looked more prominent under pale skin. What troubled me most however was the expression on his face. Sure, he had greeted me as he normally did with that hint if disturbing enthusiasm, though he looked as if he were under incredulous strain. His eyes where distant and wide in terror, as if he were in the midst of horrors that I was unaware of. Still, he turned to look at me and his face softened slightly.

"Um, I'm sorry to intrude sir but I'm here to assist you with your things." I said, still averting his gaze as he continuously tried meeting my eyes.

"Oh, don't bother with such polite business talk. And call me Barty." He said.

I was momentarily shocked, as this was nothing like the Barty I knew and feared at all. Where was the smirk? The clever comeback? The usual stare that lingered continuously? The ingenuity?

"S-Sir, I mean, uh… B-Barty? Are you alright?"

No- he wasn't, and that would be obvious to anyone with eyes. Still, I figured it was generous. I was still very skeptical of him, as his unusual behavior was putting me on edge. But, it was then that he did something that even I hadn't prepared enough for. Something that terrified me to the furthest degree of fear I'd probably ever experienced.

I stared at him, horrified- as he began to shake violently and uncontrollably, his eyes widened even further and he gazed right back at me. Before…

He lunged forward, and grabbed my shoulders with surprising exerted force, and I instinctively yelped in terror at the unexpected action. His expression was intense, and he shook my body as if trying to convey the seriousness of his state-

"_Chocolate!"_ He said, his tone was tense, precarious, and desperate.

"W-What?!"

"Chocolate! I NEED CHOCOLATE!" He said again, the volume of his voice increasing to nearly a yell. I gave a terrified nod and then fled from his room in a hurry, before immediately turning tail towards my own room and running inside as fast as I could.

_Chocolate… Chocolate… Where is some damn chocolate?! –Ah, yes! I have chocolate in my secret stash…_

I instantly ran towards the drawer that I knew held all of my candy, and with a flourish I opened it and hurriedly began rummaging through the contents. Quickly, I grabbed a big bar of chocolate and went speeding back into Barty's room.

He was on his bed, still; though he was sitting up now, twisting the sheets in his struggle. I held forth the chocolate and he snatched it away, fumbling with the wrapper and box before plunging forward to take a huge bite out of the bar. I watched as he chewed, and he ate it like it was the thing that was providing him with life.

The moment he swallowed, his tense expression melted into a look of content, and he sighed with relief before taking another, much smaller bite. His shaking ceased, and he looked almost normal. Well, as normal as _he_ got anyway.

But, the smirk that usually graced his features when I was around still remained out of sight. He wasn't licking his lips, nor were his eyes wide with intensity.

He just looked… kinda sick. Like how anyone else did when they had a bad bout of the flu.

I hesitated before asking the same question I had asked earlier.

"Barty? Are you alright?"

He looked up, seemingly as if he had forgotten I was there, and he gave a brief nod, before finishing off the last bit of chocolate and muttering to himself.

I only caught one word. _"Dementors…"_

_Oh…._

It had struck me in the face like a bullet. How had I not realized? I suddenly recalled something that I probably should've recollected long ago in such a situation.

_That's right… The best cure to the terrible effects a dementor inflicts is chocolate. Barty needed chocolate as an antidote to the dementors after his recent experience in Azkaban. Chocolate makes the terror, the cold, and the depressive emotions that only a dementor and impose go away. That explains Barty's current state, and his desperation for the candy._

I sighed, and watched the strange man calm down, slowly; but effectively. The chocolate was acting like some sort of sedative for him. Maybe I should go buy more of it later…

He stared at me for a few moments before a stern expression overcame his face, and he looked me dangerously in the eye.

"Listen. You will tell this to _no one_. Do you understand?"

"Yes." I replied instantly, somewhat alarmed by the threatening growl in his tone.

That seemed to be good enough for him though, and he laid down once more on his bed, sighing to himself. I waited a moment, feeling susceptible by his warning.

"…Alright, don't mind me. I'm just going to be sorting things out for you…" I said, a hint of caution in my tone. He only nodded, probably half-aware of what I'd said.

It had been about half an hour since Barty's last outburst, and at last I felt that he probably wasn't going to have any more of them. So, I managed to unwind into what was almost considered a calm state- and I had begun by sorting out the small amount of clothing he owned into the dresser.

To my surprise, he actually owned a few very nice things; like a suit for example, and I did my best to handle his items with great care as I stored them away. I checked nervously on Barty every once in a while, only to see him watching me with a sort of half-interested gleam in his eyes. At one point, his owl had started hooting until I hurriedly hushed it with a gentle reminder, and I was content at last to know that I didn't have to deal with Barty's insanity anymore.

At last, I had finished my task at hand; and I turned around to check on Barty one last time before I left only to find him silently asleep where he lay. I was transfixed at the sight, and I watched him for a few moments. This must be a rare occasion, I thought; to see him in such a vulnerable position. His eyes where shut and his face had relaxed, even though he was quivering slightly with cold and he'd bundled up in attempts to savor what warmth his own body could generate.

To my astonishment, I realized in that instant that I was smiling ever so slightly. _No, stop it you idiot…_ I told myself- and I went searching in the closet to uncover something to better keep him warm.

"_Geez... All you had to do was get up and get a blanket…" _I found myself whispering, and to my revulsion I perceived the slightest bit of fondness in my tone.

Soon enough I found one, unraveled it, and gently spread it out over him; while being careful not to touch or awaken him. I could hardly believe it… I was placing a blanket over a Death Eater as if he where some innocent child. I couldn't tell if I was disgusted with myself or pleased that I had managed to calm him enough that I didn't have to worry. A little bit of both, I suppose.

I decided to stay for another few seconds, and I studied him again more thoroughly while he was still. For some reason I found myself transfixed with his features, that same strange feeling of being drawn to him overcoming me for the second time since I'd met him. Without thinking- I reached forward with one hand, and the sensation of touch sparked through my knuckles as I allowed the back of my hand to graze gently down his pointed face.

He gave a long, content sigh in his sleep, still unaware of anything going on outside his dreams.

His actions seemed to snap me back into reality suddenly, I drew away my hand, momentarily disgusted with myself before immediately turning around and leaving the room; being sure to close his door silently as I went.

I found myself thinking about the interaction I'd had with him, and I recalled something my old Defense against the Dark Art's teacher had once said. Remus Lupin, was his name; by far my favorite. His voice echoed through my mind like a distant memory and I closed my eyes as if to listen better.

"_Dementors are among the foulest creatures that walk this earth. They infest the darkest, filthiest places, they glory in decay and despair, they drain peace, hope, and happiness out of the air around them... Get too near a Dementor and every good feeling, every happy memory will be sucked out of you. If it can, the Dementor will feed on you long enough to reduce you to something like itself... soulless and evil. You will be left with nothing but the worst experiences of your life._" _(-Remus Lupin)_

I kept listening, and more kept coming.

"_They don't need walls and water to keep the prisoners in, not when they're trapped inside their own heads, incapable of a single cheerful thought. Most go mad within weeks._" _(-Remus Lupin)_

I myself had never laid eyes on a dementor, luckily- but it seemed that the consequences for Barty's actions where such horrors that I couldn't imagine how terrible it must've been in Azkaban. Being a naturally empathetic person, I even felt a tinge of pity for him.

I found myself back inside my own room, however Draco was there now, with a mattress pulled up near the side of the wall, and he was laying out a pillow and some blankets for himself. It seemed he had managed on his own, but he looked quite grumpy that he'd had no choice but to do all the work on his own, as the house elves where preoccupied with other more "important" guests in other rooms.

"What happened to you helping me with my stuff." He said grumpily, taking a seat on the side of his mattress while gazing up at me expectantly. "Sorry." I replied, though my tone really didn't sound "sorry" at all. He gave me a cross glare.

"Look, it wasn't my fault my dad came in and insisted I go pamper sick little Barty Crouch Jr. instead." I said sarcastically with a hint of distaste, still pretty mad that I'd had to go in there in the first place.

Draco's expression instantaneously shifted from anger to fascination, and his position showed it to as he straightened up and leaned forward expectantly like an eager child waiting for a bedtime story.

"Really?!" He gasped, mesmerized. "What happened?"

I was about to tell him everything- before I recalled with Barty had said…

"_Listen. You will tell this to no one. Do you understand?"_

I paused…

"It honestly wasn't much. Just his usual-" I did an over-exaggerated impression of his flickering tongue, which caused Draco to burst out laughing while I smiled in satisfaction. Luckily, he dropped the subject, and we instead shifted the conversation to the topic of Hogwarts, and all the trouble Draco planned to cause during our last year. _Good, I had avoided telling the truth._

I was perfectly content with this of course, and I enjoyed hearing about something other than Death Eaters. I liked talking about Hogwarts, discussing the place where I felt safe and sound. The place where I knew I didn't have to worry about being polite, seeing Death Eaters, pretending I was a worshiper of the Dark Lord, and so on. I longed to go back to school…

And I only had a few days until I did.

The next morning when I'd awoken, Draco had already gone. I groaned and wiped the sleep away from my eyes, staying in my warm bed for a little longer; not wanting to go downstairs with all the others. Soon enough though, I got out of bed and steered towards the bathroom where I turned on the hot water and took a nice, hot, lingering shower. I stayed in the shower for a long time as well, trying to stall and avoid breakfast.

About an hour later I got out and wrapped myself up in a clean towel, travelled back to my room (thank god, nobody had been in the hallways at the time), and got dressed in my usual subtle punk metal-head getup. I did my makeup, dried and straightened my hair- and then finally, I did go downstairs.

My stalling had been in vain though… It seemed that everyone had waited for me purposefully before starting breakfast. I was pretty annoyed by this, but instead of complaining I nodded and lingered around the kitchen until food was prepared.

I noticed the absence of many Death Eaters from yesterday, and I silently wondered if they'd gone out to do some business for the Dark Lord. Honestly, I didn't really care if they had or not- as long as they were gone. There was Fenrir here still, I noticed; as he had just stalked into the room, grabbed a coffee, and left.

If you've not seen a werewolf drink coffee, I'll gladly inform you on personal experience; it's pretty hilarious.

I was annoyed when I spotted Barty sitting at the table with his food, watching me quietly as I made sense of my surroundings. I settled for shooting him a glare before grabbing some of my own food and sitting at the opposite end of the table from where he was.

Out of the corner of my eye I watched him smirk and get up from his spot, and I shut my eyes with an aggravated sigh as he did what I'd expected him to do, and I heard the clatter of a plate being set down on my right. I opened my eyes again, and glared once more at him.

"Avoiding me now, are we?" He inquired, raising an eyebrow and biting into a slice of toast.

I kinda figured I didn't have much of a choice other than to face him, so I shifted my body towards him defiantly and I lifted my head in a dignified sort of way.

"Honestly, leave me alone. You're really getting on my-"

I gaped the moment I laid my eyes on him, and for a moment I doubted it was Barty Crouch Jr in front of me in the first place.

He was wearing the one grey suit I recalled folding from last night, kind of like an unbuttoned blazer over a maroon dress shirt with a perfectly placed collar, next to a tie of the same color. It even had a small golden chain attached to one pocket. His hair was styled neatly as well, the wild strands had been tamely slicked back to perfection. He must've showered as well, as he was now no longer dirty and looked very clean cut and handsome. With the dirt gone, and his hair out of his face, he was undeniably gorgeous. His sharp features could now be entirely appreciated- and it much rather suited him better. He was truly the depiction of elegance and grace.

He had been scary in his previous state, of course; appearing insane, mad, and disturbed; but now, in this new appearance- he truly expressed what he was. Clever, sly, and cunning; extremely dangerous as he was. He truly looked magnificent, in a terrifying, malicious, wicked kind of way. Even now, I can't bring myself to properly describe it.

"W-wow.."

I was still gaping, I realized then; and Barty was obviously enjoying himself. His grin had doubled in size and his tongue flashed into sight suddenly as he licked his lip, expression smug and mocking.

"Like what you see, my dear?" He raised an eyebrow challengingly, and studied my face closely as to catch any sort of confirmation.

Let's just say I became very interested in my bowl of oatmeal…

I stared into it, knowing how wide my eyes where as I felt the slightest tinge of color rise to my cheeks. I swallowed back fear, realizing how intimidated I was now just by his new appearance. If I said he gave off an aura of cleverness before; he most definitely did now. In my book, smarts were far more dangerous than anything else.

"Please, just… Leave me alone…" I choked out finally, biting my lip and refusing to meet his eyes.

"_Oh,_ but what's the fun in that, hmm? Besides, you truly are… _fascinating."_

For the first time in my life, I legitimately blushed, and I felt my pride, my dignity, and my barriers of self-protection crumble at my feet right in front of me.

Without warning, Barty leaned in close to me, a rising sensation of panic washing over my body like a wave; and I found myself frozen with dread.

"_Oh, and thanks for the chocolate…"_ He whispered into my ear friskily, so close I could feel his warm breath ghost over my skin.

"It was _delicious."_


	4. Under Your Own Spell

Chapter 4

"Under Your Own Spell"

My mind slipped from my grasp like glossy silk, like sand trickling between the crevices in one's fingers as my body went numb. I lost control of everything; as my breath quickened with trembles and shudders in every exhale; and every inhale sent a piercing pleasant sting to the core of my being. I couldn't move, think, or execute anything properly.

The man whispering shameless lust into my ear was so close I could feel it with every last part of my existence…

Oh, the feeling of his heated breathing misting over my flesh like steam onto a mirror- and the radiating natural glow of his own warmth seeping into my cheek the closer he neared me… It made me go _numb._

Slowly, I registered what he'd said.

"_Oh, and thanks for the chocolate…" _My eyes closed effortlessly in ecstasy…

"It was _delicious."_

A brief thought of restraint crossed my mind at some point through this encounter, but it had been so irrelevant at the time I'd ignored it completely.

_Am I…?_

_Have I been stunned? Put under the imperius curse? Or… Some kind of spell? Of course I had… But… It's okay… It feels nice…_

The man who had done this to me was Barty Crouch Jr… And what he had done was not something I'd ever had to face. Every particle, every inch, every part of my being was at war with itself. It felt so immoral, but oh so _perfectly pleasant._

In my numb state, I was shocked the moment he suddenly lunged forward like a ravenous animal and attacked me, lips trailing down my neck in a fiery path of burning passion.

This was what I had needed to snap back into reality… and_ realize_ what horrible things where being done to me.

As if awakening from a dream, my senses flooded back into my ears as if I were being submerged within waters of reality. It was then that the panic truly struck, adrenaline was released like bullets through my veins and defensive mechanisms to protect myself came into immediate execution.

I got over my shock of being attacked within a few moments, and in an instantaneous motion I forcefully pushed him off of me with as much strength as a small slender girl such as myself could muster. Sure, my strength couldn't do much- but my wand could; and I drew it out with a flash of lightning quick movement, not hesitating to bring it close to his face as a protective barrier between him and myself.

My hand was quivering as I held my wand, and I watched with wide frightened eyes as his expression changed. The look on his face now was what I could only describe as a burning passionate combination of both righteous fury and satisfaction.

The hint of a smirk was on his lips, and he licked them continuously as I stood boldly. It gave me the impression that _he was trying to savor the flavor of my flesh…_

The thought made a chilling shiver run down my spine.

I had been like a mouse toying with a mouse trap for the prize within; and just as I had reached forth with my tiny little mouse claws the trap had snapped shut- only for me to realize then what had been my mistake… And I had been broken out of my trance to find myself doomed.

"What's the matter, sweetheart? Aren't you having _fun?" _He teased playfully, and a tremor began to rise from my body until I was shaking violently with confusion and anger.

He slithered up behind me in an instant before my stiff body could react, and he whispered into my ear once more…

"I _know_ you want me."

My mind slipped again, and I almost lost it once more- before I dove after it and retrieved it again, turning on Barty with flames of anger burning within my eyes.

_"And who are you to tell me what I want? Who do you think you are, putting a spell over me and assuming I "want you" without any proof that that is true?!"_

A wicked smirk crossed his features as I let my rage course freely into my words; and it only made me angrier to see him snickering.

I wanted to say more, but I was interrupted by him, as he dove headfirst and grabbed my wand, casting it to the side and approaching until he was uncomfortably close to my face.

"_Oh, but I do… And my simple obvious proof is that I didn't put a single spell on you in the first place… Despite these lies you've deluded yourself with, your love is __**mine**__. Mine, for the taking… And the only spell your under is the one you've put upon yourself."_

He watched in absolute delighted elation as my face melted into an expression of horror.

_**He'd… Not put a spell on me?**__ I'd never, ever, been so terrified in my life... My body gave way and my eyes blurred with tears, to the point where Barty's face became nothing but a haze. I was terrified, not of Barty now…_

_**But of myself.**_

Every inch of my body screamed to get away, and my instinct to flee finally won over the dominant instinct I withheld to fight. Before I knew it, I had ducked under Barty's arms and fled towards the only safe haven I knew to be truly secure.

_I needed to know what was happening inside of me. The fact that Barty had not cast a spell over me… That it was entirely me that had felt numb, blissful emotions in reaction to an evil man's affections…_

_I was fully and entirely convinced I was going insane. I could only be crazy to enjoy any kind of physical affection someone such as Barty Crouch Jr. offered, right?_

Thoughts flickered chaotically through my mind like minnows, and I was in such disarray that I felt I'd lost control of every aspect I'd owned upon myself. I didn't know what was becoming of me, and I didn't know why or where these feelings where coming from.

All that I knew, was that it had all started with Barty Crouch Jr.

"_That's right…" _I breathed, after reaching my beloved pool of water under the brushy undergrowth of trees.

"_It's all his fault. This has nothing to do with me… He's a liar, right? A Death Eater. This is what he does for a living, he's toying with you…"_

And as I sat; going mad with confusion and anger eating away at my thoughts- I was completely unaware of another presence near where I sat. His gaze lingered from where he crouched like the predator he was in the plant life, growls eliciting from his fanged lips as his patience lessoned with every second. My pursuer knew what he wanted, and he'd wanted it for far too long.

At first, I thought it had been Barty Crouch Jr. who had struck me. But…

No, there was no way he had the capability to hit me with such force that I sailed across the grounds before my frail body was halted with a sickening crunch by the abrupt surface of a boulder. There was no way slender Barty Crouch Jr. could inflict such intense physical pain with only his sheer strength, and there was no way he could cause such extreme intimidation with the utter appearance of masculinity alone.

No, it was not Barty Crouch Jr who had attacked me at that moment.

There in front of me, like the grim reaper closing in to claim a victim's passing soul, was Fenrir Greyback. His eyes glistened with terrible bloodthirsty malice, the small black pupils inhuman in the way they resembled the full moon. I was too stunned to speak or protest, and I was only somewhat aware of a sharp pain throbbing at the base of my skull, while the rest of my body ached with the strain of such agony.

His voice was like the beast he resembled- a wolf. But it was not the noble kind of beast you often thought of when imaging the species; the canine that posed in front of the moon with great honor in the way it called into the night with grace and glory.

No, Fenrir was vicious, savage, and cruel.

With an eerie chill passing through my aching body, Fenrir reared back and called into the sky with all his hellish brutality, the moon rising in the distance.

Only then did I realize what a fool I was, staying out in the open for the entire day until night had fallen… Being ignorant to the danger the night could bring. Especially, when it was the night on which all werewolves of the world would release their inner beast.

Now, my hiding from Barty would cost me much worse.

Fenrir had approached me, teeth bared and jaw opening and closing hungrily; preparing to strike. I was far to injured to defend myself, and even so I reached for my wand and cast forth the only spell that came to mind.

"Stupefy!" I cried, a spark of light shooting forth from my wand. Fenrir's own wand had flashed into sight and he blocked the attack with disheartening ease.

He laughed once more, and continued his advancement towards my hurt form.

"Ah, for so long… SO LONG I have not had the satisfaction of stealing away the humanity of a child…"

I struggled against every restraint my body had put upon me, and I cried out continuously in rage of such circumstances as I watched my predator closing in at last.

I was no fool, and I knew what happened to those who were bitten by a werewolf. The bite of a werewolf is like an infectious disease; and the victim themselves will be forced into the same exact wrathful beast themselves.

Furthermore, I knew Fenrir in particular regarded it as a mission to seek out children and inflict them with the curse of a werewolf. I was to be contaminated with lycanthropy. How had I been so stupid?

Draco had been right after all… and I should have considered his proposal further to realize the obviousness in front of me. I had had the information; and the facts. I had only failed to connect it to myself.

Greyback would often purposefully dwell in nearby proximity with his victims before a full moon… And it made sense now why he had waited until now; why he had kept quiet only to reveal his master plan at this very moment.

"Ah, yes… I have not had the joy of biting a human in so long, child. And it is truly an honor to be in your position… To receive a gift such as lycanthropy. You are to fight for me now, and assist in my task to quell all wizards from this world."

I began to cry; but not in a way that it was noticeable. In fact, I didn't utter a word; not a sound, as small pearly tears slipped down my cheeks in trifling waterfalls. I closed my eyes as my doom was apparent, and I awaited the pain that was to come. I was certain that the turning from human to werewolf was not going to be a pleasant experience, and I had in fact heard how particularly agonizing it was.

I had seen the transformation of Remus Lupin into his werewolf state; and it had obviously been painful. But was I… a small, fragile girl fit for taking such torture?

A tremendous weight was upon me at once, and the weight I assumed was the mass of Fenrir as he lunged forward in attempts to sink his teeth into my flesh. I gasped, prepared for that bite to come, but-

It never did.

There was a flash of light, and the weight I had felt upon me was thrown to the side by a massive source of energy. Still pained by the injuries I'd received from being stricken, I could only watch with indistinct vision as another person joined the struggle. There was Fenrir, with his wolf like stature, dueling another thin figure that was also swaying about with boundless treacherous elegance in his or her step.

Soon enough, as my eyes focused once more and I gained control of my senses, I writhed around in my position to try and identify my rescuer. Before I knew it, I had stood up and dizzily approached the two duelers like a drunk, seeking to determine answers to my questions.

The moment I was noticed by both duelists, Fenrir leapt towards me again with a vicious sneer, jaw parting to reveal wolf-like canines, but once again he was rebounded by his opponent in the other direction. I felt a sudden protective arm around my waist- and I instinctively shifted my gaze upward to view my guardian.

My head started pounding again with pain the moment I saw his face, as the reality of the idea of this particular person saving me sent my brain reeling into confusion. Confusion that my damaged brain could not handle, mind you- and I collapsed into his arms.

I collapsed weakly into the arms of Barty Crouch Jr, whose firm grip on me supported my weak body while his other free arm fought furiously against his werewolf foe. Fenrir was in a beasty rage, and it was no surprise that a duel between two Death Eaters got very dirty, very fast.

Fenrir was sending curses Barty's way like constant bolts of lightning, and it took Barty a great strenuous effort to dodge and block these attacks while preoccupied with holding me.

But eventually, I found I was right to hold the dangerous potential of intelligence over the potential of brute strength, and Barty's cleverness earned him the victory. He knew far more about magic than Fenrir, and soon enough Fenrir's crippled, stunned, defeated form lay brutally wounded on the grassy terrain as Barty finally turned his attention to me, whispering incantations that I'd never heard of before.

The only thing I could properly register physically was of course the tingling sensation of Barty's supporting arm, and then… There was the feeling of pain ebbing away from my head.

My blinded, strained agony was slowly leaving me, and even though I was not entirely healed, the overwhelmingly unbearable aspect of the injuries were no longer present. I could now convert my focus to Barty.

But even as I stared at him in wonder through clear eyes, I couldn't think of anything to say to him.

This madman had saved my life. Yes, the madman with the rose, the third of the suspicious three, and the one who'd needed a cure from the dementors.

He captivated me in that moment, and I was transfixed with his very existence… His physical, emotional, and mental presence was dreamlike. He was _magnetizing…_

That feeling, the tingling of his arm coiled around my waist never left me as I focused entirely on him for that moment to observe him in a new light. A different perspective of mesmerized surrealism; and an enticing fascination with the absence of the fear, dislike, and distaste I had held for him once before.

There was no changing who he was, and there was no denying what he was either. He was an unrelenting, impure, cruel, Death Eater. I had accepted that, along with the fact that he was unpredictably dangerous. Yes, Barty Crouch Jr was manipulative, clever… and…

"_You're far too good looking for your own good, you know that?"_

He'd managed to regain a regular breathing pattern by then, and he grinned with a snicker at my remark, thin lips stretching while his eyes clouded with mischief.

He then pressed a firm, rough kiss to my lips, all the while bringing his other hand to my head as leverage to push my lips steadier against his own.

I let myself melt again under the pressure of his touch, however this time I did so willingly, with full knowledge of what I was getting into. I submitted, gave in- and awarded him with what he wanted. While he was forceful and hungry, I gave him full control of my lips; until finally the bold urge to give back struck me. I felt his moist mouth stretch into a smile as I myself began pressing myself back against him.

"_Knew you wanted it…"_

A frisky grin crossed my own features at that statement, and I parted from slightly to shoot him a challenging look. His eyes widened excitedly, and his tongue flickered out of his mouth in its usual way before he dove forward again.

I felt numb almost instantly. Again…

And as we kissed with unwavering passion beneath the moonlight, I whispered to him with a smile-

"_Who do you think you are, putting a spell over me and assuming I "want you"?" _

His reply was seductive and playful, and he uttered the exact words I wanted to hear.

"_The only spell your under is the one you've put upon yourself."_


	5. The Last I See You

_Message from the author:_

_Hello guys, I just wanted to say real quick before I start this chapter that I'd like to personally thank ALL of you for your absolutely amazing support on this story of mine. This is the first time I've published anything fully online for people to view and all the generous comments I've received have really touched my heart. Also, as of late I've been extremely busy so the updates will be allot slower, unfortunately. I apologize for that, and I wish I could keep you all updated every day, but I'm afraid I can't… Also, I hope you can excuse this chapter and its writing. I've found myself struggling with writer's block since the last one and my creativity has seemingly been leeched from my brain. It's weird… It's freaking me out lol. Anyway, enjoy! _

Chapter 5

The Last I See You

I cried myself to sleep that night. Silently, of course; knowing that even in his sleep noise could possibly provoke Draco to awaken. I certainly didn't want that; knowing what I'd have to explain afterwards.

I felt so much devastating, insufferable guilt that it was as if every part of my body was filthy. The frustration that poisoned my mind was driving me to the brink of insanity, and the more I tried to fix it, understand it; or even justify it- the more complicatedly chaotic it got. There was nothing more frustrating to me than the inability to control my own body, mind, and decisions. When I knew that my being was controlled by Barty, I knew that I was in the hands of a terribly dangerous man. The maddening aspect of it all was, however; that he'd done nothing to inflict this on me. _It was all me._

_I was uselessly, pathetically, hopelessly infatuated with Barty Crouch Jr._

And even worse; despite how many times I told myself run from him- I would always find myself attracted. _Infatuated._

This was my own doing, and that night as I tried to think about it, work it out through logic; and untie the knot in my thinking, there was nothing I could do to stop the need my mind insisted on.

It was like trying to tell the body it didn't need water, or food, or shelter; that it was to survive without those things. As much as I wished for those things to be true, it would never happen out of feeble mortality.

I sometimes believed there was no way I didn't have some sort of mental disorder, with the strange way my brain sometimes worked. It could be a positive thing; in creative areas. My imagination and width of endless ideas was always fantastic in arts.

However when my emotions and feelings got to be too intense, (which happened a lot,) my emotions and brain seemed to fail at communication. I drove myself mad, often; in the way I tried to furiously fix emotional and mental problems I was having. I only made it much worse for myself. When I dwelled on it; I brewed more chaos.

This of course was also ungodly frustrating.

_I didn't choose this! I didn't choose to fall in love with a Death Eater! It had been the last thing I ever wanted to happen, so how can I not control that?! I haven't forced it upon myself, and neither has Barty… So what unnatural thing is forcing this on me?! These feelings I have for him… Where and why are they here? He is nothing but a cruel, heartless, torturer! Yet, he hasn't done anything to you… He hasn't manipulated you to this. You know that, and you know it's something within you that's causing the problem._

_It's your fault, and you should feel guilty. You chose to kiss him tonight, and you chose this. This is your punishment, stupid girl. I hope you feel happy with yourself with he breaks you and leaves you to bleed like every Death Eater does. Then, will you be happy, stupid girl? You'll deserve it, the pain it brings… _

_**Stupid girl.**_

I was only confusing myself, hurting myself, and frustrating myself.

How was is that this was the result of my attempted problem-solving? If this is what happened when I tried to fix something, how could I ever be stable?

It was strange how my mind turned on itself like that, and seemingly destroyed itself. It was like mind cancer, where some unsolicited inhuman presence was prowling about in there like poison; striking when I was most vulnerable with demoralizing thoughts.

Thoughts that always degraded me to depression and self-hatred.

There was always that point however where the body got numb from too many emotions, the mind got tired from war, and the eyes got blurry with exhaustion. When that moment finally came, and sleep grimly delivered me to the doorstep of nightmares, I was there to relive my experience with Barty that night.

_It was a beautiful, live, terrible nightmare._

_I recalled it all perfectly, like the faultless focus of a camera capturing the moment of an event. This was how my dream was. A recollection of something that had really happened, and not but a few hours ago at that. _

_I remembered Fenrir, the rescue, and… _

_The kiss._

_At some point, Barty had eased me backwards until I was pressed firmly against a tree, and that was all that remained in the deepest depths of my memory regarding that night- the way he held me, caressed my skin until I felt I was hovering in the air, and the toxic high that came from the obsessive way he kissed me. It was simply addictive to the taste and touch. My body was rendered useless and befuddled, unable in its pitiful humanness to comprehend the stunning way it was being controlled… _

_Yes, I had been a wreck just minutes before my dream began… _

_But this, this was my guilty pleasure._

The following morning I awoke, and I went downstairs to find another meeting was to be taking place within a few minutes, and instead of getting a nice delicious breakfast I was forced to attend. I wasn't surprised when Barty took a seat next to me, a sharp sensation of guilt disheartening me as he took up his usual prideful, dignified stature. There was a protective haze over his expression however as he glanced over at me.

The Dark Lord finally arrived and claimed his throne at the head of the table, an unusually threatening aura in his presence as he took in the sight of his followers. His expression was dark, and slightly angered.

"_Well, then…"_

He said, dangerously smooth voice echoing through the room in a perilous, demanding tone.

"Now that it seems we all are here, I must get right to it."

I shivered as Voldemort's gaze flickered past me in its travel to reach the eyes of Barty, whom straightened up excitedly as he was addressed.

"I have been informed of an incidence that apparently took place last night amidst this property… And I must say I am _extremely disappointed in one of my followers…."_

His gaze hardened, and it flashed dangerously around the table as he continued.

"_It seems that one of my supporters has strayed from his orders… And decided to act upon his own desires rather than what I have or have not ordered him to carry out."_

I swallowed, and only then did I realize…

_Fenrir Greyback was missing._

"_An ambush took place last night near the pond outside of this house. Fenrir Greyback has betrayed my strict orders and attacked my little jewel, young Miss Star."_

All at once, each and every pair of eyes in the room searched the table for me and rested on my face, while I gulped down my dread once more and forced myself to sit up straighter. I chanced a glance at Barty, who was the only one in the room not gawking at me; but instead was staring defiantly- almost challengingly at everyone else with a protective stiffness in his shoulders.

However to my relief all eyes turned right back to the Dark Lord as he finished his announcement.

"_Mr. and Mrs. Star… I believe you have Barty Crouch Jr. here to thank for your daughter's life."_

I watched in horror as my parents exchanged grateful expressions with Barty, whom nodded in acknowledgement towards them both.

"Well, as Fenrir has somehow escaped the area despite efforts to retrieve him, I believe it would be wise to send a guardian to accompany you through your… preparations… as a safety measure. Barty, you have proven yourself worthy of such a privilege. Today you may both enjoy a leisurely day off and travel to Diagon Alley."

My father exchanged a glance with the Dark Lord and wearily gave him a respectful nod.

"As long as that's an appropriate arrangement for you, of course; my Lord…"

Voldermort was now glancing between Barty and I with concentrated thought clouded inside those slits he called eyes, and at one point I thought I'd be lucky enough that he'd spare me of Barty's presence. I didn't think I could handle being alone with him for one more second. But I wasn't as fortunate.

"I approve… I trust Barty will do well to protect our precious treasure here?"

Barty was smirking now, his tongue grazing his lips testily as he eyed me keenly.

"_Yes, my Lord… I will be certain to take precisely perfect care of her…"_

I was annoyed now, angry that these people were talking about me as if I were not even present in the room. I was being treated like a trained beast, some kind of prized animal only valued for its exotic features. I felt like a restless tiger trapped in a cage while my captors decided my own fate.

I almost even said so out loud, and I'd opened my mouth, only to close it with a warning look from Barty himself.

"_In that case, you are both excused."_

Barty graciously stood and bowed deeply to his Lord in respect, before nudging me in indication to do the same. Stiffly, I repeated his actions blindly before Barty led me away.

"B-but!" I protested, before I was cut off while gasping in surprise and Barty suddenly took strong hold of my arm, pulling me up the staircase.

"How will you take me to Diagon Alley? You're literally one of the most wanted Death Eaters in the entire wizarding world! You'll be captured!"

_"Don't worry_. I have something for that."

"_What?"_

Barty didn't answer me, and once we reached his room I waited impatiently for him to retrieve whatever it was he was rummaging about for.

Eventually, he brought into sight a cloak like liquid fabric- the material smooth and liquescent in the way it flowed like a stream on a calm spring day. I gasped aloud, and instinctively approached in awe as I gazed at the wondrous cloth.

"You must be joking! An… _Invisibility cloak?"_

Barty nodded, but was eyeing the thing with great distaste. That wasn't normal, this thing being an incredibly treasured, rare material. So, why was it that he regarded it with such hatred?

"_Yes…"_ He spat, lip curling as he gazed at it.

"I spent years under the secrecy of this invisibility cloak, beneath the imperius curse of my wretched father… Hiding me away with his house elf… _I hate it_. Nonetheless, I must use it again today. You are right, I cannot afford to be detected in our travels."

I tilted my head, as he spread the fabric into a sheet of glimmering luminescent matter.

"But, how are we even going to get there."

"By broom, of course. I'll have you know I'm an exceptionally skilled flyer."

I rolled my eyes and chuffed sarcastically at his remark, not entirely convinced. He glared and slung the cloak around his shoulders; and with it they disappeared beneath the cloak.

"W-Whoa! Your head is floating in midair!"

I giggled and pointed, as Barty's head indeed titled downward to inspect his nonexistent body while he frowned.

_"I hate this…" _

He grumbled, and then dove into his closet to retrieve a broom.

"Hmm, a Nimbus 2000. Not too shabby." I gloated, raising an eyebrow as he led me out the entrance to his room and out the back door.

"You hush up." He said, but he was grinning now; and for the first time since I'd met him it looked like a real smile. A smile a normal person would make, on a regular occasion to be happy about.

I returned the grin momentarily, before it fell drastically, and he propped the broom up beneath him and slowly I watched his head float higher from a few feet above the broomstick.

"C'mon, let's go."

He growled impatiently, motioning for me to join him.

"But…"

I paused, and eyed him suspiciously.

"Two people on one broom? I honestly don't trust this…"

He gave a loud sigh and bit his lip, before replying briskly.

"Are you a fool? It will look suspicious if I'm on a broom by myself that appears to be flying in mid-air without a rider. As for you, if you appear to be controlling the broom while I'm hitchhiking on the back, then nobody will suspect a thing. _Think about it."_

I frowned at the dryness in his tone, and shot him a glare before finally climbing on with as much distinct reluctance as I could convey.

I was shocked however when he shot forward like an arrow, the moment I was situated, and I squeaked as wind suddenly struck me across the face in the projectile.

My cries soon turned to joyous laughter however, and I blissfully tossed my arms above me in the air to catch the airstream as I glided.

Barty was quiet from behind me, but I felt his arms suddenly clasp tightly around my waist for support as the broom sunk forward in a sudden drop, before I eventually pulled us out of the succession.

Even then, I had forgotten entirely what my original purpose was, and I flew with Barty around the area miles and miles at a time while performing daring stunts, sudden changes in direction, and extreme speeds to deliver that joy of riding through the air that I'd missed for such a long time.

Eventually, after a whisper of a reminder from Barty behind me, I switched our course to head for Diagon Alley, and I allowed the pace of the broom to slow radically to calm the ride.

For a while, an eerie silence drifted through the breeze that followed us as we went, and I wondered how much longer I would be stuck with this man that I knew was terribly dangerous for me. I had been caught up in my thoughts, recalling the conflict I'd struggled through the night before, and as I remembered it an instant sensation of guilt clouded my emotions once more.

My joy of riding died away, and I felt remorse in my mistakes once more. I was here alone with Barty Crouch Jr, and from experience I knew that never ended well. I was in danger, and furthermore, I was likely to give in again if he attempted to try anything.

But even so, he seemed momentarily quite calm. I was shocked when he slowly yet firmly attempted to ease me back to lean on him, and in response I instantaneously fought against it furiously, struggling and writhing beneath his grasp before finally he gripped my shoulders instead in attempts to calm me.

"Stop it! _Now!_" He snapped, steadying me forcefully while I snarled and twisted in resistance.

For a moment, I ceased moving like he'd insisted, and twisted around to gaze at him angrily- only to see nothing- due to the effects of his invisibility cloak (that I had almost entirely forgotten about…)

Though I was startled as a sudden finger appeared in front of my lips, while Barty abruptly hushed me.

"We're going to be here awhile, you know… I suggest you get a little more_ comfortable."_

I scorned at him, and even despite the concealing cloak I could hear the smirk in his voice that was no doubtedly present on his face beneath.

I refused at the time, but even so as my muscles got further exhausted along the trip, I eventually found myself leaning into Barty's chest; both of his arms still wrapped protectively around me.

He seemed to be pleased now, and even to the point of which he began attempting a sorry excuse of conversation.

"So, this will be your last year of Hogwarts. Am I right?"

"…Yea..?" I said, unsure of the situation. The idea of Barty endeavoring any kind of civil talk with me was downright unfathomable.

"What house?"

"Um... Slytherin."

"Ah, yes; Salazar Slytherin. Ambitious, cunning, sly, and talented." There was a hint of approval in his voice, but just before I could answer he unexpectedly continued.

"I was in Ravenclaw…"

For a moment, I struggled to accept that; and my brows furrowed in confusion before I answered.

"What? Ravenclaw? Aren't you Slytherin? I thought that all Dark wizards are Slytherin. I mean, it's pretty much been silently marked as the house of evil…"

Barty chuckled, and I heard a slight swoosh of the cloth as he must've shaken his head.

"No, I was Ravenclaw. The more you think about it, the more it actually makes sense. Ravenclaw traits are intelligence, cleverness, creativity, diligence, witty, and talented."

I considered his proposal for a moment, somewhat disbelieving of his claim.

"I honestly think I should've been in Ravenclaw," I replied, thinking it over as I spoke.

"I'm the most creative person at Hogwarts. You should see some of my art, and my writing. Oh; I'm also a fantastic actress, and a great singer. I'm super smart to! The Ravenclaws are always practically dripping with envy whenever I strut by with my latest masterpiece in hand. Oh, if only, they wish; I was in their house to magnify the strengths of their traits!"

I turned around slightly and flashed Barty a proud smile, and I could almost swear I heard a smile in his tone as well as he answered.

"Hmm, very interesting." He said. "Those are things Ravenclaws most definitely value. Perhaps, the Sorting Hat truly does make occasional mistakes."

I giggled, and nodded before sighing and resting my head gently back against Barty.

"So, you were smart you say?" I said, finding myself making efforts to continue the chat.

"Yes. When I was back at school I was the best in my year. I excelled at anything I tried. I received 12 O.W.L's total."

"_**TWELVE?!"**_

__"Yea." Said Barty, and there was even a slight hint of laughter in his tone.

"But I was never worthy enough for my good for nothing father…." I frowned as his voice changed suddenly from a chuckle to a hiss of hatred, and I tensed slightly in fright at the unexpected change.

Apparently he noticed, as I felt his body loosened slightly from behind me apologetically while he gave my hip a reassuring squeeze.

"…_Sorry."_

"It's okay..."

To my reassurance, Barty and I ended up discussing our lives at school for the rest of the trip. I almost felt momentarily like I was talking to a real person, with feelings… I was momentarily under the illusion that Barty was a friend of mine, and that he was someone who was normal. Not the insane madman I'd met out of unfortunate chance.

The deception was quite powerful undeniably, especially as I could hear his beating heart emanating softly from beneath his chest as I rested my head against him softly. It added to the effect… Making him seem more… Human, and more vulnerable. It was a strange word to pair with such a person.

Still, I felt a tinge of appreciation for his consideration of me; when I realized he had purposefully left out everything that had anything to do with his Death Eater occupation. If I were someone listening who didn't know that already, I'd have assumed he'd grown up to be a fantastically well-mannered young gentleman.

I had to remind myself though, that_ I knew better. _

The trip had been time-consuming, but when the two of us finally reached the entrance to Diagon Alley, Barty ensured his cloak was properly situated before we entered.

It was a strange feeling, and my brain had trouble telling me that I was not alone while my eyes told me otherwise. I occasionally nearly said Barty's name out loud, before I would instantly close my mouth with wide eyes, realizing just in time my near mistake before I'd carried out the action.

Still, I led him around the area and shopped all day endlessly until I'd purchased everything I needed. At the end of the trip, as everyone had begun to leave the area, Barty even offered quietly from under his cloak to maintain carrying some of the heavy bags I was hoisting around, but I refused even so with a slight grin on my face.

Quietly, once I reached an alley empty of any sort of residents, I felt a slight breeze brush my ear as a whisper reached me through the invisibility cloak.

"_Follow me, I want to show you something… secret."_

Feeling skeptical, I turned my gaze to stare intently at the slight marks that appeared on the ground as Barty walked, and I found myself following the trail into a forest canopy that had seemingly remained hidden behind a secluded area of the shopping district. My heart began to pump faster and faster, harder and harder beneath my chest as I continued further and further into the strange, unknown area.

"B-Barty?" I called, frightened without the visionary comfort of him next to me.

"Don't worry, we're here now."

The tracks stopped abruptly, and I nearly ran into Barty as he slipped into sight; the cloak slithering to the ground in a pool beneath him. I lurched backwards and tilted my head towards him; eyes expressing my anxiety as I gazed up at him. He approached me suddenly, and I gasped out loud in terror as he captured me with both arms in a tight, rib-crushing embrace. I was motionless for a moment, and my mind strained to decide whether or not this was a serious act that could result in danger, or if it was a safe and secure gesture of affection.

Still, I ended up allowing it for a moment, before I tugged away from him slightly in attempts to withdraw from the suspicious embrace.

However I couldn't seem to extract myself from the situation, and I found myself trapped…

"_B-Barty, what are you doing..? You're scaring me."_

_ "Hush…" He mumbled, and I shut my eyes in unease._

"_This is the last I see you before you're gone for the rest of the year…"_


	6. Parting With Death

Chapter 6

Parting with Death

I small feeling of sadness stirred inside of me, and this was a noticeable change to how I usually reacted when Barty attempted forcing any kind of physical affection upon me. I waited for that sudden rising sensation of overwhelming panic, but… It never came. It never bubbled to the surface and caused me terror. It never triggered inside of me to result in a struggle to get away.

Instead, I was simply there, irresponsive and unmoving in answer to Barty's tight embrace. I simply let him do as he pleased, all the while not returning the gesture to his discontent. Eventually, however, I gave in a little and rested my chin on his shoulder glumly, a strange dejected depression still churning within.

"Barty…" I mumbled sadly, and he pulled away to look concernedly into my eyes.

"What is it?'

I didn't answer, though my eyes fell to the ground in response, and my expression tightened into sorrow as I heaved a sigh.

He attempted once more to approach me, and he reached forth with a gentle hand to hold my cheek softly while he leaned in and pressed a steady kiss to my lips.

For a moment, I again waited for fear to arrive. And again, it never did. There was instead, in its place; a gentle calmness that shifted into a serious disposition as I realized what I had to do.

No matter how nice it was, nor how much I craved the kiss of Barty Crouch Jr, I had to control myself; and I had to tell him this wasn't right.

He was still relentlessly pressing his kisses against me one after another- eyes closed blissfully yet blindly to my purpose.

"W-Wait…" I said weakly between a kiss, and it was a request that was unnoticed by him as he continued on without acknowledging the feeble attempt.

Persistently, it went on; and I felt that bizarre consciousness of losing my grip on my senses. My mind was slipping away quickly, my body melting in desire; along with the task I knew I had to commit. I had to break the chain- and stop this before it spiraled into something beyond my control. Beyond what I could control in myself.

"_Stop!"_ I said finally, loud and clear into the musky night air as I firmly but gently pressed my hands against Barty's chest in objection.

Finally, he stopped abruptly with a disappointed, rejected expression on his face. It hardened in an instant into something more angered, and spiteful.

"_What?! Why?"_ He growled, stepping forth once more in blatant protest to my request.

He was now moving and squirming in his position, as if he didn't know what to do with the emotions he was feeling. Like he was having trouble expressing them in ways that weren't… daunting.

"_Why do you lead me on?_ Why do you kiss me in return and unexpectedly break away without consent, _and it's not like you're making this easy!_ So why, why do you have to always stop it like that! It's maddening, Because _I know you want it!"_

His eyes had widened in the intensity of his feelings, a small sneer in his lip as he spoke heatedly.

I gave a sigh, gathering my patience, and I then reassuringly placed both of my hands on his shoulders, looking the frustrated man in the eyes with importance in my expression.

"_Listen…"_ I urged, slightly tightening my grip on his shoulders.

"I know I haven't been fair with my mixed messages. It's true. But…We can't do these things. Not together, not _us. _Don't you understand? You're a Death Eater… You're dangerous for me. _You're no good for me."_

"_What have I ever done to you?"_ He snapped, harshness in his tone as he broke eye contact with me, pacing around dangerously.

"It's not that, Barty. It's what you _could_ do to me. What you've done to _other people._ You're a treacherous man. I can't trust someone who tortures others without regret. I can't love someone who refuses to commit true loyalty to anyone but a man who's committed endless murders. I can't predict the actions of a mentally unstable madman. Don't you understand why this has been bothering me so much?"

There was a pause, and in the distance the call of a wild animal emanated from within the forest. The sun was setting, painting the colors of a sunset above us in deep purples, sun kissed oranges, and summery pinks. I gazed at Barty Crouch Jr. with sadness in my deep dark brown eyes, feelings of regrets and sorrows coursing through my heart slowly and agonizingly.

Barty only stared back for a moment, and in an instant, all his rage- his fury, and his frustration simply ebbed away. It melted, and beneath was the face of a man who knew and accepted the truth. The truth that he was an evil, cruel, creature. Not even worthy of fitting into the category of "human."

Barty's honey caramel eyes lowered slightly in defeat, and I watched in complete awe as he said something I'd have never imagined a sadistically heartless sociopath would ever utter.

"_Your right."_

That was all he said, and with a gentle sad sigh, he reached for the invisibility cloak. He was glaring now again, eyes shooting poisonous glances at his surroundings before he swung the cloak around his shoulders.

I was still stunned and speechless, eyeing the man skeptically as he began to walk once more in the direction were we'd left the broom.

_That…. Was it? He wasn't going to put up a fight? He didn't try to kill me? _

_ Even so, I had a feeling this wasn't over. Death Eaters don't give up so easily. _

"Barty, are you alright?" I asked halfway through the forest brush, trailing behind him as I once again focused directly on the ground in search of his footprints.

_"Don't speak to me."_ He spat from somewhere in front of me, and I bit my lip painfully at the sharp reply.

I did as he said and simply followed silently for the rest of the way, still on the lookout of he was going to try anything to harm me after what I'd done.

But such a thing never happened, and we were once again in the clearing of Diagon Alley's entryway, Barty's broom still propped neatly (with a few protective jinxes on it, of course) against a safe broom rack near the gates. I watched as the broom seemingly floated in midair, and it was propped beneath Barty's invisible form before he made a small noise of gesture for me to get on with him.

I gulped nervously and approached quickly, swinging a single leg over the wood of the broom and preparing for takeoff. We set off much slower than we had before, and soon enough the smooth ride became just as leisurely and pleasurable before. However, there wasn't that entertaining conversation with Barty anymore, on our way back.

There was simple, saddening, defeated silence that hung in the air like the scent of death. I said nothing, and neither did my accompanying Death Eater. I could only hear the slight noise of his soft breathing from behind me with the occasional shift of weight on the broom every now and then as we glided together through the sky.

There was a point in which I was hardly conscious through a sleepy haze when Barty hesitantly wrapped a single arm around me; so softly to the point where I nearly missed the contact altogether. It tightened slowly as he tested his limits further, till soon enough both arms where coiled tightly around me in an embrace like before. Yet again, I responded by leaning back against him with a sigh. A tight hug can do so much for someone who's hurting.

Still, the silence ebbed on; and nothing was said the entire rest of the trip home. When we finally had reached my house, I had fallen asleep. I was shaken awake gently, and I weakly slid off of the wooden broom while Barty tore the invisibility cloak away from his shoulders, his slender figure coming into view whilst he quickly folded up the liquescent material.

His sharp features where hardened into the same expression he'd been wearing before we'd left on our way back; stone cold and emotionless. Still, he was just as undeniably beautiful as he'd always been; even more so as he absent-mindedly smoothed back his tousled brown straw blond hair.

_He was beautiful. But he was gorgeous in the way a forest fire is beautiful; something to be admired from a distance. Not up close. _

Otherwise, you get consumed in flames.

It was already 6 in the afternoon, which meant that in order to make it to the Hogwarts train in the morning, I needed to get packed. I followed Barty into the house with new purpose in mind, and as he went upstairs with me trailing behind into his room, I swung about the corner of the upstairs hallway and entered my own room instead. With my new supplies in their bags, I dumped out the contents on my bed and settled for organizing these things into being packed first.

I blasted some heavy metal from my loud speakers openly into the room as I did for good measure, singing along without caring how the noise effected Barty. Hopefully, if I was lucky enough, I'd even achieve annoying him to a level.

It didn't take long, and soon enough I'd checked and rechecked every nook and cranny of my bedroom to ensure that I'd gathered every last thing I needed for my last year at Hogwarts. I had everything I needed, and I was certain of it as I ushered everything I'd packed into a corner of the room to sit and wait idly for tomorrow. My little Golden Masked owl with her delicate features was bobbing up and down excitedly on a perch inside her cage; tweeting happily and spreading her wings as she knew this familiar routine could only mean one thing. We were going to Hogwarts.

"You ready to get out of this hellhole?" I inquired absent-mindedly in her direction as I stood and approached her, her twittering gaining volume as I ensured her traveling gear was in place.

"Good girl, Melrose." She tilted her head upon hearing her name.

"I wonder how the cat is doing at Malfoy's house." I noticed as the twittering lowered an octave as if in disapproval of the mentioning of my cat.

During this year's summer, Draco and his family had offered to keep the cat at their mansion in hopes of preventing another "accident" with Bellatrix during her stay; as we knew she'd been arriving with the other Death Eaters. Last time that had occurred, and the cat had been roaming through the house, Bellatrix had startled the cat and caused it to go mad with fright.

Now, every time my little kitty caught sight of the madwoman, she attacked without consent. I didn't blame her though, considering Bellatrix's solution to the problem at the time had been a form of transfiguration.

I was to see my cat on the day back, and I sure missed the little flurry of blue I caught out of the corner of my eye while visiting the pond. She was a rare breed, a Russian Blue. And like the name suggests, she was indeed a crisp vibrant cobalt sapphire color. She got along well with another cat known as Crookshanks, Hermione Granger's fluffy orange tabby at Hogwarts. I bet they missed one another as well.

I had originally planned on leaving in the morning, but the moment I discovered that Draco had already left for the train, I decided it was time to get out of the house and get an early start this year. Besides, I was desperate to escape being in the same threshold as Barty Crouch Jr. I had purposefully set out in attempts of avoiding the man altogether before I left, but with all my things in hand, I must admit that I'd made quite some noise trying to haul all of my things downstairs and out the door. Not to mention the constant cries of my owl as she thought she was being left behind in her cage. (I decided on making two trips, my owl being what I prearranged on bringing down last.)

I instantly regretted that decision, as I'd finally gotten everything outside. On my second trip downstairs, owl in hand with the rest of my possessions, I had struggled outside once more to see Barty himself standing stiffly next to my things.

"What are you doing?" I inquired testily, suspicion rising as he almost guiltily shifted about on both feet.

"No, what are _you_ doing." He growled at me, face contorting slightly in what I could only comprehend as irritation.

I was now just as irritated as he seemed to be.

"Well, what does it look like? Leaving._ Leaving my own house." _

"Why now. You could easily leave in the morning."

"I want to get out of here."

"And why would that be, dear? Could it possibly have _anything _to do with me?" There was a teasing, dangerous smirk in his voice now, and a spark of defensive anger shot through me like an arrow.

"So what if it does?"

"Honestly, this is quite pathetic. Did you honestly think I'd be letting you simply leave?"

"Um, yea. This is _my house_. I come and go as I wish. Last time I checked you don't have a say in what I do or where I go."

Barty bit his lip, and his eyes narrowed as he approached me.

"_You are angering me, my dear… And I must warn you… There are consequences for such actions."_

"Quite frankly, _my dear,"_ I said, mocking his nickname for me, _"I don't give a damn."_

Spitting with fury, Barty lunged forth and captured me in a harsh grip; one that sent a numb throbbing through my arms that would later maybe even result in a small bruise. Still, I struggled; and his hold only tightened the further I fought to get away.

"Stop it! Let go of me!" I hissed, and Barty only used his grasp to forcefully ease me backwards until I was backed harshly into the side of a tree.

"_You have no right-!"_

"_I have every right."_

And with that, he was pressing harsh kisses to my face. I was now yelling in protest, craning my head in the opposite direction in attempts to escape the contact; only for him to dive into my exposed throat with the same unrelenting, rough bites to my neck.

"_You… Deserve… It…" _

He snarled between kisses, finally making efforts to take hold of my chin and force my face forth in his direction so that he could connect his lips with mine.

_No… Please….. I can't do this anymore…._

It felt like it had gone on for hours on end; and there had been a point where I'd given up struggling. I felt guilt in how easily I'd given in, where my cries of protest had decreased to whimpers and my struggling had ceased into slight protestant twitches every now and then.

The kiss wasn't different from any other I'd shared with the cruel man. It felt just as nice, tantalizing, and mesmerizing as the others. But no matter how fantastic the physical sensation was, the mental and emotional sensation of being forced into this was making it a hellish, confusing experience. Especially with the firmness and ungentle treatment he used upon my fragile, delicate body.

At last, it stopped and Barty himself had seemed to back off slightly. The harshness in his treatment had lessened into something gentler. Still, this did nothing to cure my horror.

"Have we calmed down?" He asked me at last, panting rapidly as he loosened his grip on me ever so slightly.

I could only nod in response, a terrified exhale escaping my moistened lips as I hoped he would let me go at last.

Finally, he did; and to my surprise, I didn't do what I'd planned on doing. I didn't run for my life, nor did I attempt any means of getting away.

I simply sunk to the ground in a pathetic heap, curled up into a defensive ball against the tree, and began to sob heavily. I cried and wept, the deepest of dreadful sadness coursing through my heart endlessly. I wasn't sure how Barty would react to this, nor did I care; as long as he just _stopped kissing me. _

Within a few minutes I felt the arms of another pulling me upward, and I struggled blindly once more in the most pathetic way imaginable. I only ended up in Barty's lap- my crying only intensifying in response to the unwanted touch.

"_P-please… I can't…"_

The gentle whisper of a "hush" was being uttered into my ear, Barty's warm breathe ghosting over my neck as he cradled me in his arms.

"_N-no… I don't want this… I thought I told you… We can't… I can't… I told you not to…"_

My mindless rambling continued through my sobbing, only to be answered by Barty's continuous comforting hushes.

"_Y-you… Made me…. You're so mean…"_

"_Hush…. It's alright…."_

I was being lulled by a killer's lullaby, my sore, wet eyes dripping with endless tears as the nightmare continued on. I registered a brief sensation of confusion that had sprung from the sudden change in Barty's actions. From forceful, rough, and unrelenting to gentle and calming.

"_W-Why…. Would you do this to me…?" _Spasms of tearful hiccups ceased my helpless body through words, and Barty only held me tighter.

He didn't answer, but only continued rocking back and forth like a mother would do to soothe a child. It only resulted in fogging my mind up in blurrier confusion.

This was a strange emotion I was feeling. Very strange, indeed. As I had stated before;

_A tight hug can do so much for someone who's hurting._

But… Why could this still apply to the situation in which I was being embraced by the person whom had hurt me so terribly in the first place?

Still, I could only helplessly allow it as my cries turned into silent tears that dripped noiselessly from my flushed cheeks; my lips shut tight and my teeth clenched together to tightly my jaw ached. I wouldn't make a sound.

Even as Barty began pressing soothing, careless kisses that wettened my neck as his lips traveled in a warm trail down to my shoulder, my silence wasn't broken. My weak, broken body hung loosely against Barty's frame, and as he softly took hold of my chin to tilt my head upward to face his, I returned the kiss as he pressed his lips to mine once more.

This was different, and at this point I didn't care anymore. I didn't care what this would do to me, and I didn't care how it would make me feel. I didn't care if it wasn't okay, and I didn't care at all if this drove me insane.

Finally, he had done it. I had been pushed to my limits, and I had been broken.

Barty Crouch Jr had broken me.

And what happens to a person who has been broken?

They have nothing to lose, and only everything to gain. A broken person becomes reckless, dangerous, and careless.

And in that moment, as did I.

I cared about nothing and nobody as I finally allowed my deep hidden desires to be quelled by the sensation of Barty Crouch Jr's soft lips.

My guilt ebbed away, along with any notion of regret that ever existed within me.

Only reckless, thoughtlessness.

And so, for the first time… I gave in entirely. I gave in in every aspect possible, and allowed myself to lose every ounce of myself….

In that moment, as I effortlessly kissed Barty Crouch Jr,

I was happy in a way that no person should be.

Nevertheless even so_, I was happy._


	7. Contagious Evil

Chapter 7

Contagious Evil

I couldn't believe what I'd done. The crime I'd committed; so terrible, I was no better than a Death Eater myself. I knew I would care later, but even then I still didn't give a damn. I didn't mind how wrongfully perfect it felt being forced into something with Barty Crouch Jr- how precisely maddening the sensation was. I could literally feel my mind twisting with darkness, the corruption spreading like poison until it was the poison that I became myself.

I do daresay; let it not be unmentioned, that I indeed do have a very deep, dark corrupted evil that dwells somewhere deep down within my mind. Yes, someplace inside of me there is a reckless, heartless, cruel, insane beast. The idea of it is so inhuman, yet; oddly perfectly human. Every existing person has a darkness within, do they not? I had learned that the hard way- and I'd learned not to trust mankind for that reason. Men are folly, fickle, deceitful, heartless, angry, hateful, selfish creatures. I hated being human- but I couldn't help that. And even I had demons inside.

There were times when a certain bitterness overcame my normal self. I noticed this most happened when I was hurting emotionally; to a point of which my spite and hurt spilled over into hate upon all who had hurt me. It had happened before, and I'd hurt people terribly due to this "demon" I had living inside of me. It was strange, knowing how my anger could turn me into that. Still, it was even stranger knowing that sometimes I didn't _want_ to be… _better._

Sometimes, I wanted to watch the world burn like I had for so long. I wanted someone to hurt so deeply and agonizingly like the way I hurt. The idea was sickening, but it was my humane aspect that I couldn't seem to quell.

When it comes to mankind, the notion of "insanity" is more appealing to us that we like to admit.

Things that are brutal, savage, sickening, maddening… horrifying. We _like them._

_But still, I was such a hypocrite. I would dwell hatefully for hours upon mankind for how evil I knew they all were; how heartlessly they had hurt me in my past. Still- that is another story entirely, and let it not be mentioned, my insignificant battle with agony. Yet here was I bathing in my own maliciousness as if I were sprawled out upon hills of gold._

But I had to remember; the reason why I was still…. Somewhat sane. Even through all these years something had kept me rooted to the idea of goodness. Otherwise, I would've gone off with my parents and finally become a Death Eater. No, I had to remember… There was a certain goodness inside of me that stopped me from doing that. As out of control as my inner madness got, something kept me wholesome.

Still, that part of me had been momentarily chased away as I had my way with Barty Crouch Jr. I was enjoying myself in a "guilt-ridden pleasure" sort of way, my disgusting human desires being shamelessly quenched at last by the wet kissing that still went on.

I was being firm, and steady; my previous hurt and vulnerable state being forgotten as the pain bubbled and festered into something much more harmful. Desire tainted with malice.

I was angry as I remembered what he'd said before this had all happened.

"_You… Deserve… It."_

And I had.

I simply didn't care, though.

_Screw it. Screw it all, I'm going to Hogwarts in the morning and I'm taking what I want before I leave. I'll leave it all behind like it never happened and run from it like the coward I am. But still, it doesn't matter; does it. What the heck and why the HELL not._

I craved that toxic kiss; that tantalizing touch. So I _seized it_, and ravished this man like a ravenous animal.

I wasn't surprised when he returned the indulgence, of course. At that time we had been both equally insane. I knew that he knew it, too. He was a bad person.

_And he knew I knew that, as well._

Still, it was satisfying in an emotional way as well. The idea of accepting this in one another. The thought of acknowledging the evilness we both held and accepting that it was both there inside of us. Even, if; in such a case, I was not _entirely_ corrupt.

Still, I knew this had to end at some point. A brief notion from my "good conscience" told me that my greedy self had had enough.

Like my inner angel and devil were bickering.

"_Stop it, you evil thing. You've had enough!"_

"_Oh, but I'm not even near satisfied…"_

_ "No! You are DONE!"_

"_No…. I don't think I am… I will take what I want. Because I want it."_

"_STOP!"_

I pulled away in an instant, my lips pulling harshly against Barty's in my retreat as I immediately began panting heavily. He didn't make any move to bring me back, and simply sat limply with his back against the thick tree trunk. His eyes looked distant and moony, but still clouded over with their normal sense of wide-eyed madness. His lips; red with the sudden rush of blood that had moved to them, were curling in an undeniable, relishing smirk of a smile. His breathing was rapid and intense, chest rising and falling beneath me. I realized I had been clutching the opening of his blazer so tightly that my knuckles had turned white, and I let go with stiff fingers.

_ "Knew… You wanted…. This."_

He managed to breathe between hurried inhales and exhales.

I glared, still catching my breath myself as I looked him over. His hair; once plastered back, and been strewn about into a wild mess- and I could even tell were my hands had tangled themselves within the dark honey brown mess. His cheeks were flushed and then again his skin looked slightly pale, his thin, pointed features standing out vividly even in the dark. He still looked as terribly, poisonously attractive as always.

I was somewhat surprised when Barty's head suddenly fell forward loosely, and he rested his face in the crook between my neck and shoulder. I sighed, a bit of a heartfelt motherly affection springing up inside of me at the feeling_. I couldn't help it…. I was a girl._

"I want to say sorry but I'm not going to." He finally said, and I made a face of exasperation at that.

_Men._

Purposefully saying that to convey to me that he wanted to apologize, all the while blatantly stating that he refuses to out of pride. So confusing.

"I hate you."

He gave a small mocking snort at that, and I bristled with anger again.

"_You certainly fail at expressing that properly, then. Because what you just did says otherwise." _He was chuckling now, in a bit of a frightening way. But still, I wasn't fazed.

_Even though he had a point. _

God dammit, I hated it when he had a point.

"Well…" He said, and I felt his lips graze my skin as he spoke from where his head lay peacefully.

"Are you alright?"

I grimaced, and yet again made another face (that he couldn't see…)

"Seriously? _You're asking me this now?!_ I'd appreciate it a hell of a lot more next time before you _attack me."_

Still, I was surprised when he asked that question. I didn't think for a second that he actually cared about my own wellbeing; that he only regarded his own personal needs and wants.

"_I didn't attack you. If I'd attacked you, you'd be dead."_

"_Um,_ you forced me to kiss you and held me up against a tree. _Last I checked, that is a classified form of attack."_

"I'm a Death Eater. That's what I do.

"That is literally the most pitiful excuse I've ever heard."

Another dark chuckle of his.

"I'm a Death Eater, Jazlynn. I'm a bad person. It is in my nature. Of course this was going to happen. Of course I was going to corrupt you. I'm clever, dear. I'm sad to say; I cannot stop myself. It was simply meant to happen like this. There was no stopping it. I wanted something, and when a man like myself wants something, he will get it."

I simply gave a disapproving grumble like this, but despite the noise; it did make sense. He was right, in a way. He was a Death Eater, and what else could I expect? Did I really even for a second expect a Death Eater to respect my personal space and shove aside his own desires? Of course not.

"I'm a bad person, too." I said, and I tilted my head a little in remorse as I realized that.

"No, you're not." He said, immediately.

"You're not a bad person until you can admit it and feel no shame. You're not a bad person until you've destroyed a human, and it brought joy. Not when you still feel remorse at the idea of it. Not when you still care about others. You are not a bad person… _Until you become like me."_

I heaved a sigh of both sadness and relief. It was satisfying to hear it from someone who knew what it truly meant to be evil, despite how insane that sounded.

Being hurt had once burdened me with that hatred and spite that I had thought was evilness. But it had also granted me a gift. A gift of realization. A gift that endowed me with the ability to truly sense and feel emotions. Deep, pure, unwavering feelings. In that sense I knew I cared for people more than others. It was strange to say; knowing that not long ago I had once said that I "sometimes cared not for those I hurt."

But I did, honestly. When the rage ebbed away, the spite lowered, and the hatred disappeared; my hurt and remorse only deepened in regret for whom I'd ever hurt.

Barty was right, then. I wasn't evil.

"Thanks, Barty…" I muttered. And I gave another sigh.

I started a little when he had suddenly, yet gently pulled his head away from my shoulder to look at me. There was a hint of a smile on his face, and it shot a sensation of warmth through me at such a rare sight.

However, I jumped in terror as the dangerous man suddenly whipped out his wand, and with a swift motion he moved fluently. I closed my eyes instinctively and shielded my face before I could see what he was doing, but then I heard his voice echo through the air in that strange Scottish brogue.

"Accio, rose." He called, and my curiosity instantly took over as I opened my eyes to see what he was doing.

His wand was pointed into the air, towards the house- and I watched as a small, unidentifiable object glided through the air towards the commanding point of his wand. He caught it with a liquid smooth flourish of his hand, and I strained to see in the dark what it was.

"Here you are, my dear."

He handed me the soft object he was holding, and upon further inspection I realized what it was.

"The rose you gave to me…" I said in wonder, turning it over in my hand and stroking the velvety petals that still somehow hadn't died.

"I left it out on the rock near the pond."

"Yes. I want you to take it with you."

"….Why?" I asked, a hint of skepticism in my tone.

He sighed impatiently, and then gave a shrug. I simply rolled my eyes and nodded reluctantly, before finally getting up from Barty's lap and tucking it delicately into my owl's cage.

"Can you keep that safe for me, Melrose?" I asked, and the owl twittered happily in response.

"Thank you, good girl."

I turned once more to face Barty, and he was standing by now- approaching absent-mindedly as I rubbed my eyes tiredly.

He smirked, and lifted an eyebrow.

"Well, looks like you'll be starting off your year on lack of sleep thanks to me. Your welcome."

"_Thanks."_ I said sarcastically.

He grinned.

"Now take your rose and get your ass outa here before you make any more stupid decisions."

"_Thanks… Again…"_ But a smile was on my face now, and I took hold of my stuff; ready to set off in departure.

I got one last look at him, before I left. Him, and his velvety soft voice as he whispered dangerously to me.

_"See you next year, my love."_

And I knew that those words, and that image would forever be branded within my memory. Tattooed to the bottom of my eyelids, and every time I blinked; it would be a flashback.

"I sure damn well hope not. You do funny things to my brain."

And with that, I was off.

It had been a struggle finding means of transportation with all of my things, but soon enough I'd come across the Night Bus which had stopped abruptly in my path.

"How Convenient." I had said.

Despite the discomfort of the journey- and the wobbling sensation that came with physical queasiness; (it took an entire hour for the effects to subside entirely) I was pleased to escape from Barty Crouch Jr after all. Not in the same way as I had once hoped, though- and my attitude had shifted drastically towards him just before I had gone. It was a strange sensation, and it only made my drip all the more dizzy as I tried to figure it out on my way to the train station. To my surprise however, I didn't feel the regret and misery I thought I'd be experiencing by now after such a violent, almost traumatizing event. It was like it hadn't even happened though, after the resolve that had occurred.

I was somehow spared of the consequences my poor choices made. Still, I eventually finalized a decision that it was time to move on.

_ It's time to let go of him, now. He doesn't exist anymore in your world… He never did. You are past him now, and you are at Hogwarts. You are to focus on more important things, now- and get over the insignificance confusion that one summer brought._

That had been a good plan, and it had worked effectively- as I made my way eagerly towards platform 9 and ¾'s. I urged myself to move faster in my approach as I spotted that infamous wall that led to the Hogwarts Express, and my legs began to throb as I pushed them past what they were capable of.

In my giddiness, I had run straight into the wall- before I'd resurfaced in an entirely different world.

Literally.

All around me were magic-folk, the trollies and bags of Hogwarts children skidding and sliding against the ground as they hurried about busily. There were the reassuring parents standing above the first years, whispering words of comfort to their frightened child as they were about to embark on their greatest journey yet.

The familiarity, and safety that washed over me the moment I stepped into this world was such a relief I nearly cried. I soaked in the sensation of this wondrous world, and basked in the glorious feeling for a moment. Once I was content at last, I made efforts towards sorting things out on the train. And, easily soon enough- my things had been stored away, with the exception of my owl; who had comfortably perched herself on my shoulder while still stubbornly clutching Barty's rose in her talon.

Barty's rose….

No. Stop. He doesn't exist.

"C'mon, Melrose… Just let go of it… Honestly, I told you to take care of it then, but this is now; and I'm telling you to let go."

Melrose only replied with a brisk, firm expression of determination- and I was briefly reminded of the Gryffindor's head house teacher; Professor McGonagall.

"Fine, keep it- you stubborn thing…" I grumbled, and the bird sang happily once more in rejoice at my comfirmation.

I decided to ignore that- and instead focused on locating my friends.

Now, quite honestly- my whole social life was quite complicated. It was a major pain to be friends with two groups that sincerely hated each other with every fiber of their being, and it was an even worse pain when you had to deal with each side being pissed when you "hung out" with the other.

It was a childish situation that had existed since Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy laid eyes on one another.

It had taken me a few years to earn the trust of the Gryffindor's, and I didn't blame them honestly; knowing that their experience with Slytherins in general justified it. But once they'd discovered I was not just your ordinary Slytherin; and that I was a human being with caring conscious feelings for other people; I was happily accepted into their realm.

I liked Harry Potter's little trio- with Ron Weasley and Hermoine Granger. They each had their quirks that I enjoyed- and the entertainment of watching the three interact together in such a strangely "fateful" way. They complimented one another amazingly, and it was appalling to watch.

I liked Harry most of all, and I saw a lot of myself in him. He gave off that aura of "heroism," in everything he did and said. We had our differences, of course- but by the end of our third year (and I'd accidently involved myself in the mystery of Serious Black; discovering his identity along with the trio-) we got along like best friends. I was glad to have earned his trust, and he was a loyal, noble friend that I enjoyed at my side.

Then, there was Ron and Hermione. Complete opposites, but nonetheless all the better when together. I liked Ron for his humor and the amusement he provided. There was never a dull moment in my life when Ron Weasley was present. As for Hermione, her maturity and intelligence was something that I valued greatly.

I shared similar traits of hers, and I had a feeling she held a related high regard for me. I was similarly smart, sensible, and matured myself.

As much as I liked the golden trio, I also often found myself hanging around the Weasley twins, Fred and George. Sometimes, accompanied by Lee Jordan.

The hobby of "troublemaking" was something I'd developed over the years, thanks to the influence of the two mischievous tricksters- and I was just as tricky as the both of them now.

However- nobody could compare to my one closest friend. Not a single Potter, Weasley, or Granger could replace Draco Malfoy. And honestly, despite that he would rather die than admit it- I was almost certain he felt the same way.

Draco Malfoy was not a nice kid, obviously. And I knew that. Still, I had adapted to it and learned how to coexist with his rudeness towards my other friends. I had learned how to cope with supporting both without offending the other, and it was a skill that had proved most valuable.

Even so, I sometimes thought I was a bit of a positive foil to Draco. When I was around, he was less spiteful and rude. Less likely to call out a mean name or accuse Potter of anything. Even Potter himself had admitted that seemed to be true- and it made me feel good knowing I at least I mattered enough to Draco that he would (mostly) take to passiveness when I was around both groups.

Still, there were those moments he just had to say something- and even then I was still peacemaker.

Luckily, however- I didn't have to deal with that now, as I spotted a sleek soft head of platinum blonde hair from within a compartment. Grinning like a dork, I immediately headed for it and swung open the door dramatically- not failing to grab Draco's immediate attention.

"Sit down, you idiot." He said, but he was grinning as well. I chuckled at that, and my grin widened into a beam as I spotted my gorgeous Russian Blue sitting proudly next to Malfoy.

"Saphira!" I cried, rushing forth to scoop my blue cat into my arms.

She mewed joyously and gazed up at me with her big blue lapis lazuli colored eyes- her ears twitching excitedly.

With my cat in my arms, and my owl now perched pleasantly up on the headboard of my seat (still clutching the stupid rose)

I settled down happily directly across from Malfoy.

My happiness wasn't even spoiled by the presence of Pansy Parkinson, Crab, and Goyle- honestly. I disliked the three of them (especially the two boys) and it was no secret that Pansy Parkinson despised me. I was competition in her eyes; an opposing female in her quest to gain Draco's affections. But even so, Draco wasn't interested in anything more than a relationship of "settle friends" with the pug-faced girl.

Still, it seemed that a silent agreement to set these things aside for now hung in the air- as if a signed contract was dangling in our compartment window as a reminder. As I pictured this in my mind, the perky little lady with the candy trolley wheeled by- uncountable assortments of goodies and treats with their tempting delicious exteriors appearing in the window while she asked politely.

"Anything from the trolley?"

She sounded a lot less enthusiastic than usual, and I assumed it hadn't been that great of a sales day for her.

"We'll take… One of everything!"

I said, a wide grin on my face. I was a sweet tooth and I didn't even care much to hide it at all. Candy was fun, and so was eating it. Especially when it was magic candy.

"Oh, but I'll have two of the chocolate frogs, and with that three boxes of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans."

Her face almost instantly lightened at that, and it took almost an entire ten minutes for the sorting, paying, and finalizing to carry out.

"Allow me," said Draco smugly as I was asked to pay.

He held forth his riches openly- obviously flaunting his riches for everyone to see as the lady took them from him happily.

"You rich snob." I said, but I was laughing as I passed out the candy to everyone and began eating.

It was tradition every year that we all eat so much candy we get sick. And that had started on our first year- our first trip, and our first taste of trolley candy. It was strange, how the familiar candy somehow seemed to taste ten times better when it had come straight off the trolley.

In this sense, I would never lose my childishness for love of candy.

"Can you believe this is our last year on this train? At this school? Eating this candy… From this trolley?"

I remarked, my mouth full of chocolate frog.

"Oh, save the sob stories for the last day…" Draco said, rolling his eyes sarcastically. "There will be plenty of tearful goodbyes then. And then there will be me, flipping off the castle as I say _good riddance!"_

I sighed at him, and frowned- but this was no less than normal.

He was grinning expectantly, waiting for me to reply and start our usual playful bickering- but I honestly didn't feel in the mood right now.

My sarcasm had been sucked dry of me, thanks to Barty Crouch Jr.

My eyes widened, and I reminded myself within my own thoughts-

_NO! He doesn't exist!_

"I'll be right back…" Said Crab, rising suddenly while Goyle followed. I assumed they'd gone off with Blaze or something- and I decided my slight curiosity towards their departure wasn't worth investigation.

Pansy herself had (annoyingly) scooped up some of the candy Draco had paid for and left, her face stuffed with sweets as she turned towards the same direction as the two others.

"What are they up to?" I asked, quircking an eyebrow as Draco and I watched her go.

"I don't know, wanna find out?"

"Not really."

Draco sighed dramatically once more, and then stood.

"I'm gonna go check up on them, then." He said. "You can wait here if you want, and be your ridiculously boring self."

Another shot, and again he waited for a reply.

"Alright."

Rolling his eyes, he left- and embarked on his journey in following Pansy's trail.

Once I was sure he was gone, I let a mischievous grin cross my features, and I to left the compartment. I stuffed my pockets with the rest of the candy in the compartment and took my owl and cat with me to the front of the train, in search of a few people in particular.

"Harry? Ron….? Hermione?" I called quietly- and just then I spotted the redhead, brunette, and brown haired girl sitting tightly in a group within the same compartment. A wide grin spread across my face and I knocked on their window- unable to contain my excitement.

"Jazzy!" Cried Ron joyously, and he skipped up to get the door for me.

"Ron! Harry! Hermione!" I smiled and leapt about the small space, digging into my pockets for my candy and tossing it into the air like rain.

"Look what I've brought! Candyy!"

Laughing like an idiot, I watched the three smile and laugh along with me, scrambling for their favorite bits of candy as they caught sight of them in their descent to the ground.

"Oh! Chocolate Frogs!" Said Ron, lurching for one as it tumbled into the side of my seat.

"I could swear you all haven't changed a single bit since our first year," Hermione chided amusedly; and I smiled.

"Psh, what? Me, a pureblood maniac Slytherin, associate myself with inferior creatures such as yourselves since my first year? Impecable!" I cried out, in a such a loud, dramatic, animated way; it was more than obvious that I was making fun of myself along with my fellow Slytherin friends.

The three burst out laughing, and Harry straightened his glasses just before they tumbled to the ground in his spazzes.

"Hey, you sound a like someone I know, huh!" Said Ron, still chuckling.

"Yea, unfortunately." Chimed in Harry.

I smiled, and laughed along with my friends.

I thought to myself then, as I gazed at them all happily.

_I was going to ensure this last year would be the best one yet._


End file.
